sterling pov
Tyler had left and josh and i went to bed
both tired, and stressed, and happy.
josh was spooning me of course from what we had just gone through,
he was always the one to try and calm me down.
weather i was in a panic attack
or stress
or something like this had happened.
i loved him so much, but i had only met him about a month ago.
what would i do? should i tell my mother that i have not talk or seen in almost ten years?
i haven't even met josh's family and im carrying his baby
god what has my world come too?
i ask my self with a little laugh at the end.
well, im in the same bed as the love of my life.
i have a little human in my belly.
and im okay.
life's okay.
i turned around to snuggle with josh a bit more; he adjusted to me moving.
i closed my eyes every thing was okay.
i fell asleep feeling at home, in josh's arms
I loved it.
i suddenly woke up, feeling tears down my face. i was painting and sweating.
what happened?
i looked to the side of me at the clock
3:08 AM
it read
"shit" i said as a whisper. knowing that i would need to go to work the next day
i herd josh wake up and felt him movie his hand off my hip to rub is eyes
"what? are you okay? whats going on?
josh said look at me.
"oh my god are you okay? you're sweating... why?"
"yeah..." i sniff " im fine, just another nightmare"
"awe kitten, im so sorry you have to deal with those.." he said tightening his grip on my hip " what are they about. if you don't mind me asking, you don't have to tell me anything if you don't want too"
"no its okay, i can tell you. i have your baby in my belly" i said with a chuckle and a smile
"true" josh said with a smile and a kiss
"um well, i had a not so great childhood and my dad had pasted away from drinking to much a-and" i said, my voice cracking on pasted "and um.. my mom went in to drinking and drugs, she abused me and my brother and i turned 18 and i left. not saying anything to my mom or my brother. i miss him... i have his number but i don't really talk to him just because i always feel the need to say sorry for leaving him in the hell hole for so long...." i said as more tears trail down my face "i had felt alone and empty for so many years. that i just gave up, when i moved out.. i ran away with my boyfriend at the time...of course i was a virgin so one night he got me bitch-face drunk and rapped me... then leaving me by a ale in downtown Columbus and um the reason why i ran out in such i hurry when i found out that i was pregnant is that i got pregnant from him.
i was mostly happy. i was living with my dad's aunt who actually gave a shit about me. i had just started my 2 trimester of the pregnancy and we went to the ultra sound and the baby had died. and that was the end of me. i was super depressed for over two years, trying to commit suicide 2. and after the depression came my aunt who i hate her guts now started treating me like shit. i had no job. i had to deliver my first baby at 18 and still born. and no one behind me.
i eventually got on my feet leaving my aunt and moving where i am now, i am finally in a good spot in my life now. i have an amazing boyfriend and his amazing friends behind me, no body treating me like shit and a baby in my belly" i ended up with a lot of tears down my face and i saw josh a bit teary eyed too
"hun.. i-im so sorry" he said wiping the tear off of my face then his.
"don't be, im okay now" i said with a smile and a kiss
i looked over to the clock, it was 3:29 now
"come on, lets get to bed" josh lightly pulling me back to the bed. again he was spooning me. i loved it.
"hey sterling?" i herd him say...
"yes jishie?"
" you have nothing to worry about. nothing bad will ever happen to you again, okay? i ove you so much." he said with a kiss on the top of my head and i replied with a
"i love you too"
WOW OK SO THATS THAT, PLS DONT KILL ME FOR WHAT I HAVE PLANNED.... I LOVE ALL OF YOU, YOU GUYS WE HIT 400 READ TONIGHT!!!!!!! I MEAN RLY. btws tomorrow is thanksgiving so i more than likely wont update tomorrow but we will see! thank you all sooooooooo much!!!! also dont for get to vote and share :) thx
