take my hand - joshler

15//

visiting hours were eventually over and tyler had to leave josh. reluctantly, he walked out of the hospital that his best friend, well, his boyfriend, was laying inside. he couldn't think of everyone that he must be going through. tyler had a slow painful walk home. he was thinking about josh the whole time. he knew that he was gonna be in shit when he got home as it was 7pm and he was supposed to be him half an hour ago. he also couldn't tell his mum why he was gone for so long. but that was at the back of his mind at the moment.

the wooden door that entered into his home was slightly open letting the night time breeze in. it was cool, but not too cold. just enough to stop the family of five from sweating. tyler's mum was watching tv with tyler's sister. he walked in, trying hard not to cry when his mums head snapped over to him.

"you're late" she sternly exclaimed.

"yeah, i, i lost track of time. sorry"

"do it again and you're grounded, go upstairs and stay in your room"

tyler obliged not wanting to get into anymore shit with his mum. his bed was freshly made by his mum. she makes his bed every morning. he sat down on the bed and turned his music on. his music calmed him down. the soft tunes filled his dark room, which was only lit up by a few christmas lights hanging in the corner. the lights complimented his pastel blue walls and white carpet. the room was very calming and helped tyler calm down.

his notifications were going off but tyler had no motivation to talk to anyone. he muted the notifications and placed his macbook on his bedside table. his ukelele was laying on a pillow on the floor so tyler put it back where it was supposed to go. tyler lied down on his bed and looked at the ceiling. the dark green feeling was still there but was being over powered with a black feeling.

this feeling was like no other. as we know, black is a dark colour, and black causes tyler to have dark thoughts. dark thoughts such as self harm and crying.

dark thoughts such as suicide.