Standing Alone

Chapter 23

{okay this is a long chapter for me. The next one will be longer! 😏 but now... you have to wait longer as well... I really have to concentrate on my exams, 'cause if I have a subject below 70% my parents take away my phone, laptop, ps3 and the worst of all!! MY SKETCHBOOK!!!!!! And I tell you, I can't live without my sketchbook...}

enjoy this extra long chapter! Full with fluff!!! Because after this one...

The fluff will be gone...😱
And will be replaced by angst.😈

Kanan's POV:

I walked towards Ezra to see him kneeling beside the river. His wheelchair was some feet away from him. I wondered how he got out of it without our help. He's smart, he doesn't really need us... but we help him anyway.

"Watcha doing, kiddo?"

"Looking."

"At what?"

"The water."

"Why don't you sit with us? Something wrong?" I said placing a hand on his shoulder.

"No. I just wanted to sit here."

"Oh... okay. Mind if I join ya?" I asked not really expecting an answer.

"No. not at all."

I sat down beside him and noticed he putted on a short on the Ghost. His legs were in the cold water. Moving back and forward, like he was walking.

"I can move them. I just can't walk. It's like my legs can't carry me." He said answering a question I wanted to ask.

I looked in his eyes and saw sadness... I never really stood still to the fact that it must be hard to sit in a wheelchair... you can live with it, but you'll still miss the times when you could go everywhere you want... poor kid... I wanted to ask many questions, but the words didn't come. And I don't know how... but Ezra answered them...

"I can live with it, Kanan. But it's true, I'll always be that child who can't help himself. I'll never be the same I once was. But I'm fine. Battles leave scars. A few of them you can see and others not. It are reminders of faults. Some scars made by others and some caused by myself. For example, my legs remind me that I have to watch out who to trust. Like... "

He stopped for a moment and then continued...

"Barriss was there for me. Always. She took me in when I was alone, she acted like a second mother, treated me like her child. She trained me and helped me become who I am now. But... I never wanted her to help me... I never knew why. Maybe I was just stubborn or maybe... the force wanted me to realise that she wasn't the family I was looking for... after the 'accident' I still didn't want her to help me. I tried to do everything alone."

"So secretly you want us not to help you?" I said sad.

"No, that's my point! I never wanted someone to help me, I thought I could do it better on my own, but... not with you guys... already on the first day, when Zeb helped me on the bed. I would never want anyone else to do that! But I let Zeb. Or when you guys push my wheelchair, I let you. And I don't know why, but I feel safer than ever... Even the people I know my whole life, don't let me feel like that. You do."

I was a little astonished from what he was saying. He really meant it. He looked away from the water and looked in my eyes. I couldn't help but give him a hug. And he returned it. After some minutes we separated and stared back at the water till we heard Hera yelling at Zeb and Chopper..