"Love for Bismuth" (Bismuth X Female Reader!)

Chapter 2 - On My Mind

In the morning I tried to open my eyes as best as I could, but I was still very tired. That's why it was hard to do so. Somehow, I found myself laying on the couch. The same place where I sat with Garnet last night but also covered with a soft blanket. We must have talked for so long until I just fell asleep. As I managed to open my eyes at least a little bit, my vision was still a little blurry but I could see that there was something standing on the table in front of the couch: Pancakes. With chocolate sauce and raspberrys. „I know these are your favorite!" the sweet, gentle voice of my little brother could be heard from the kitchen. He made breakfast for me.. ((That is a pretty nice start of the day...)) I rubbed my eyes carefully and smiled softly at the sweet gesture of Steven. While Steven grabbed a fork for himself and me to eat together, I got up from my laying position and sat on the couch.

Steven sat down next to me, having his breakfast and the two forks in his hands. He handed me one of the forks "Bon appetite~" I still remembered him being very sad yesterday. And also the fact he hadn't told me the real source of his sadness. I know it was about that gem, but not exactly the reason. I wanted to ask him, but on the other hand I didn't want to make him feel bad about it again. There was a strong voice inside me, the voice that told me to talk to him. So I gave it a shot "....Steven?" the boy turned his attention towards me. "Yes, (Y/N)?" hesitating at first, I finally spoke up "What is the reason...for your sadness yesterday? You didn't have the chance to tell me." "Ohh..." Steven placed his plate with Pancakes onto the table. He swallowed the food he chewed on. "You know...I just wished that things...would've turned out different." "What do you mean?" A feeling of restlessness came upon me. Steven continued "I had this argument with her...she showed me that weapon. The 'breaking point' that was supposed to..." he stopped for a second "...shatter gems." Shattering gems was always a sensitive topic for me. I couldn't imagine befriending someone who has this attempt.. To me, it would ruin the honor of my mother.

"I...of course saw good sides of her. She was motivated, strong and optimistic. I never thought she would have had 'that' side. I wish...I could've talked to her more...I...wish she would've listen to me." I always told Steven to never argue with someone, but to try and talk to them. 'A discussion is always better than argueing. You talk about your emotions and thoughts, instead of letting your feelings take over you.' These are my words. And I'm very proud of Steven that he took these words seriously. Rubbing my little brother's shoulder, I tried to motivate him. "You know Steven...I somehow believe she's had to much emotions and thoughts going on inside her at that time...that she couldn't control herself..." Suddenly, Steven's face turned upset again. This is the thing I wanted to avoid. His voice's gone deeper and quieter "I wish you would've met her back then..." "Why that..?" The boy tried to put on a fake smile "I feel...like you could've handled that better...than me" "What? N-No Steven...don't say that...you tried your best to--"

The ring of my phone interrupted me: I got a message from someone. Steven got curious "Who could that be?" ((This is a very inappropriate moment...)) I took my phone to check who texted me: It was Ronaldo. 'Wanna hang out? :3' My brother glanced at my phone and couldn't stop himself from giggling. "Why did you save him as 'Ronaldo McDonaldo'?" I had to giggle as well "Well, his last name is 'Fryman' so...I thought that would be cool" Winking at Steven as soon as I finished, he laughed at the funny name once more. His happy expression made me feel relieved. After finishing my breakfast with Steven, I texted Ronaldo back 'Hang on, I'll be ready in a sec!' I rushed to the bathroom to get myself ready for the day. Meanwhile, Ronaldo pulled out his phone in exitement as soon as he got the message. He told me that the time we've spend together was amazing to him. He may have weird hobbys and interests, but I always respected it and supported him in any situation he went through. Having a bright smile as he made his way, he kept whispering the same sentence over and over again. "Can't wait to see her again..."

* * * * * * * *

Ronaldo and I made our way through Beach City, talking about all sorts of things that have been happening in the past few days. But through this whole time, the thought about what Steven told me couldn't leave my mind. ((I feel...like you could've handled that better...than me)) I repeated this sentence over and over again in my thoughts. I was way more quiet than usual, and Ronaldo would be lying if he said he didn't notice that. "Is something the matter...?" At first I only shook my head, not wanting to bother him. But this made him even more worried "Come on (Y/N)...I feel that something's bothering you..." On the other hand, I was pretty happy he cared this much. Maybe it's not a bad thing to talk to someone..."Well...I had a lot of thoughts on my mind lately." Ronaldo made me look at him, giving me a gentle smile "Tell me about it.." 

I explained everything to him, what I felt, what I thought. And later on, I felt relieved having all these things off my chest. Ronaldo listened very carefully this whole time. "Maybe Steven's right...maybe you should get your own image about her. You can even try to talk to her that way. Who knows, maybe she'll listen to you more." ((No...if she's not even listening to Steven...I don't believe she will listen to me either...)) "Thank you so much for listening to me...I really appreciate it that you took the time to listen to my babbling..." He blushed at these gentle words. "N-No problem...that's what I'm here for..."