torn • jb & yg

e p i lo g u e

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When you fall in love, it is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake, and then it subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots are to become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the desire to mate every second of the day. It is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every part of your body. No ... don't blush. I am telling you some truths. For that is just being in love; which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over, when being in love has burned away. Doesn't sound very exciting, does it? But it is!" - Louis de Bernières

"Congratulations! You made it!" I heard my friends, Lucy and Hans yelling at me once I walked outside the auditorium holding my degree. Ira was extremely proud, he had told everyone I was his sister. He was wearing a suit which was something totally weird for me, he's always on his jeans and sweaters.

"Thank you guys!" I said as I hugged them back.

"I am so happy Haz, your parents would be so proud." Lucy said as he rested an arm around my shoulders. I nodded as I looked at Ira.

"They are." He answered.

After the graduation we went to have dinner in a fancy restaurant. We talked and drank all night, then we celebrated in a club with some other friends.

I returned home to find out that I got a big bouquet of flowers from JYP waiting on my house as a congratulatory present for my graduation; I found this gesture extremely cute. There wasn't any message from them though. Or at least nor from the one I cared about.

***

I called Lorel two days ago and they already bought my ticket. I am going back to Seoul in a week. I was excited because this time apart from everything had made me missed Seoul so much. I couldn't believe it but I was longing to come back. Also these months away from everything I left behind in Seoul helped me to realize the only truth I always knew: I am actually in love with someone and I need to tell him once I am back in South Korea.

I haven't talk to any of them since I came here. I thought it was necessary for me to clear my mind and feelings. I focused too much on my exams and came second in my promotion. I graduated with excellent grades.

I wanted to call him to share this with him but I thought it was better if I didn't. Maybe he needs some time apart from me too. Time helps to clear our minds and mend our hearts.

I packed everything I needed immediately and the rest of my stuff Ira is going to ship it to Korea which is probably going to arrive in a month from now. I checked all my stuff before going outside the apartment

Ira was waiting in a cab for me, he had placed all the suitcases inside. I took a last glance at my old apartment. This is what our parents left us. I've been living here probably my whole life and now I was changing it for a different place even in a different country, away from here.

I was happy because this suppose to be a great improvement for my career but I was sad too because I was leaving my home to pursue a new one.

We arrived the airport and Ira was sad the whole way. He knows I won't be coming back, only for short periods of time and vacations. Our lives will change from now on but it's for the best. He'll come visit often and that excited him.