The Family of Bats (DRABBLES)

How to Care for Your Human

"Hello, my friends, League of Justice, and Justice of Young!" Starfire yelled loudly as she came in for the party in the Watch Tower.

"Hey, Starfire!" Supergirl smiled.

"Ohhh! I'm so excited!" Starfire hugged Supergirl.

"Tight... hug!" Supergirl gasped.

"Oh! Many of the sorries!" Starfire put her down.

"Why are you so excited?" Black Canary asked.

"I have made a movie for all of you to enjoy!" Starfire yelled so that everyone heard her.

"A...movie?" Martian ManHunter asked.

"Yes. I have made a movie for all of you!" Starfire smiled.

"Okay. Do you want to watch it?" Flash asked.

"Oh! Yes!" Starfire laughed, twirling around in the air.

She then came down and gave the CD to Flash, who put it into the CD player.

Everyone turned their attention to the large halo screen that popped up.

Flash pressed the play button.

Up came an image of Starfire, floating in the air.

"Hello to future people watching! Today I would like to show you all how to care for the humans! First, you need to get a human to do the experiments on!" Starfire smiled brightly.

She went off the screen and when she came back, she was holding a curled up Dick Grayson.

"This is the human of my choice. His name is Dick Grayson and this one is of the male specimen." Starfire explained.

"Hi?" Richard looked at Starfire then the camera in confusion.

Starfire put him down, then went back up to the camera.

"As you can see, this human is tiny and fragile. So, like all other humans, we have to be extra careful not to hurt them! That mean we have to hold back our strength and speed. I shall explain." Starfire brought the camera down and put it on a tripod. She then went back to where Dick was standing.

"One, our strength. See as I hug him with some more than human strength." Starfire hugged Dick tightly.

"Hurts! Can't...breathe!" Richard gasped, trying to get away.

"As you can see, it hurts them. So, you must control your strength so that you can properly hug without hurting. See?" Starfire gave a gentle hug of which Dick hugged her back.

"One question." Richard said.

"Yes, my Dick?" Starfire asked.

"Why are you doing this?" Dick asked.

"Oh my little Dick, it is fine. Go back to what you were doing!" Starfire patted his head a few times.

Richard just shrugged before leaving.

"Next, we shall discuss speed. If you are too fast around your human, you may get them sick. They cannot keep up with us. I shall not be demonstrating this because Dickie will get sick." Starfire said.

"Now, we shall discuss what a human needs. A human needs food, water, warmth, comfort, sleep, and entertainment." Starfire said.

"As you can see, humans like food, therefore, you should always make sure that they have a supply that they can access at all times. This human loves what humans call 'cereal'. So, there is always cereal in the dwelling that they live in." Starfire said, taking the camera to show Dick pouring a bowl of cereal.

"What?" Richard asked, spoon in his mouth, bowl on the kitchen island.

"Nothing, my little one." Starfire patted his head.

"Now, humans need to be fed three times a day. Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner." Starfire added.

"Next on our list is water. Human need to drink plenty of water. This water needs to be able to be accessed at any time and it needs to be clean and free of parasites and anything else that can harm them." Starfire said, getting a cup of water and placing it by Dick.

"Now, your need to make sure that your human has access to warmth. If they get too cold, they will get sick, but if they get too hot, they smell funny and make water through their skin." Starfire said.

"It's called sweat, Star. And that happens when we get too hot or do exercise." Richard said.

"Yes, if they get too hot, they do the sweat." Starfire nodded.

"Next, they need comfort. Every human has insecurities that they need to be reassured about. In order to administer comfort, you must find out what comforts your human. For my human, he needs to be held, wrapped in soft, fluffy blankets and told that he's a good human. Now, some humans may cry, do not be alarmed! You need to hold them tighter and make sure that they know that they're loved." Starfire scooped Dick up and held him close, patting his head, and saying sweet things to him.

Richard started blushing with all the attention and then hid his face in her neck.

"Our next need is sleep. Humans need to sleep at least one hour. Some humans can function on one hour of sleep and others need up to 12 hours of sleep. That is okay though. You need to make sure they have a comfortable place to sleep such as a bed or couch. Then, they need pillows and blankets." Starfire put Dick back on the couch and gathered a blanket and pillow to show to everyone.

"Depending on the preference of your human, they will like either a hard, soft, super-soft, or medium pillow. Some humans like fluffy blankets, and others don't. That's okay too! Just make sure that they have what they prefer and a nice place to sleep. Do not put them in the corner to sleep. Humans do not like that, nor the ground to sleep on." Starfire explained.

"And finally, the humans need entertainment. This comes in several forms. CD's, TV, Computers, Movies, and Carnivals are just a few of the many entertainments on Earth!" Starfire smiled brightly.

"If they do not have the entertainment, they will get bored and destroy things." Starfire said.

"We don't mean to destroy things. We just get bored and try to have fun and then things get broken in the process. Accidentally!" Richard stressed.

"That is what humans need, now what you need as a caretaker of a human is the ability to defend them. Humans are like any other race, they pair off and create babies. However, some people who aren't in a pair or are in an unhappy pair will try to steal your human. It doesn't happen all the time, but when it does, you need to be prepared to defend your human. First, you clearly state that this is your human. Then, if anyone tries to take your human, you must fight them. You fight to keep your human! NO ONE WILL TAKE MY HUMAN!" Starfire screamed at the end, hands and eyes going green with her energy.

"Star...please calm down." Dick said.

"I'm showing them how to respond if someone tries to take their human. If someone would try to take you, I'd kill them." Starfire stated.

"You can't kill here! You get into trouble for that." Richard stated.

"We'll talk about that later. ANYWAYS! Those are the basic needs of humans. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask." Starfire nodded.

The movie stopped.

No one spoke.

Then, a few people burst out laughing.

"That was. Oh my gosh! Starfire, that was gold!" Flash laughed, hitting her on the back.

"Thank you!" Starfire smiled.

Nightwing just hid, embarrassed, by the foodtable.