suicide thought (Ponyboy)

Cut

(All the book is in ponyboys pov)

"Soda I can't - take it - anymore." I spoke choking on my words in between sobs and the tears pouring out of my eyes. We sat on the cold tile floor of the bathroom I had blood pouring out of the small cuts on my arm.

Flashback
I couldn't take it anymore my friends are dead and no one cares for me anymore I'm just another mouth to feed for Darry a tag along for Steve a joke to twobit and a freak to soda. Here I am standing looking in the mirror I'm hardly looking like myself purple-black bags spread out under my eyes tear stained cheeks and a scar right under my chin from the time I was jumped. "Come on Darry you have to have a razor some where here" are the words I mumbled while I searched the medicine cabinet above the sink "aha" finally I found on. My back was against the wall I slowly slid down so I could be sitting. The cold metal was in my other had my sleeve to my hoodie I always wore was scrunched up so there was easy access to my wrist.Dragging it across my skin felt good digging the blade in a little so it went deeper. One cut for my parents who died because of me telling them to go out,One cut for my brothers who don't give a damn about me anymore, One more for dally and Johnny who died also because of me then the last one my arm stained red by now with the amount of blood on it now the last 3 cuts for the socs who jumped me or just them in general. Then as I was making the last one soda walked in "PONYBOY WHAT THE HELL PUT THAT DOWN." Oh shit I was caught well only another couple day to suffer I thought "Soda I can't -take it -anymore ." I managed to choke out in between sobs and cries.
End of flashback-
"Yes you can ponyboy stop talking like that and whip all the blood off."
Soda snapped back but saying it calmly "No soda I can't I just -- need to die everything's my fault everyone hates me."

A/N
So this is way better then suspected so I love it enjoy vote comment I love reading comments so.
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