Gone Too Soon (Police Officer/Delinquent Relationship) BOOK 2

Chapter 1

PLS PUT YOUR PLAYLIST HERE (E.G: Avril Lavigne When Your Gone)

"Lost time is never found again" - Benjamin Franklin

Robert Tew once said "appreciate what you have while you still have it because one day you won't." Before Levi, there was nothing I truly valued enough to miss. Now that he's gone, I realize how much I value companionship.

I miss there being someone I could talk and work through challenges with.

I had gotten so use to doing things on my own before Levi that I realize now, how much easier it became when I had something there to coach me.

When Levi passed I decided that I would make more of a conscious effort to be a good friend to Imogen and Sienna. I would need them to be my ride or die chick.

I invited Imogen over for dinner. I asked if Sienna wanted to join us but she had other plans.

"When are you going to talk to me about Levi?" Imogen asked, poking at her potato's with her fork.

I made one request when I invited her. I said that I would talk about anything, other than about Levi.

I guess she wasn't on the same page.

We exchanged a look. "Not now," I said. If I had it my way, maybe never.

I was selfish.

I wanted to keep my memories of Levi to myself.

Imogen knows that Levi and I became an item once I finished my community service. She knows that he was something special to me and she said she understood why I didn't want to talk about him.

I wasn't ready to talk about him.

I wasn't ready to share my treasured memories of him with anybody.

I knew the consequences if I were to open up to her. Emotionally, I'm afraid I'll break. I haven't dealt with my emotions. I'm trying to do better, for him.

I have personal goals I need to meet. I don't have time to breakdown and lose focus of everything I'm trying to accomplish here.

I need to graduate highschool. I need the good grades.

I need to make money so I can continue to live in Levi's townhouse. I have to take on as many hours as physically possible.

I don't have time to become emotional.

I'm afraid if I do, I'll never be able to stop crying.

"OK, that's fine." she said. "I just thought it might help if you talked about it. I hardly knew the guy---well, besides his obsession with you at school."

I don't talk about him.

I wanted him to myself.

"I don't think it will," I blurted out.

I want to avoid all the emotional mambojambo. How you do that? You don't acknowledge it exists.

I need to focus all my energy on accomplishing my goals and proving my self-worth.

Levi said I was a good person.

He said that I was smart and capable.

I was going to prove just how right he really was.

Levi changed me.

He took someone that was at the lowest of lows and made her want to be someone.