Hello Sergeant (Bucky Barnes)

So Sorry

Sarah's POV

 I used the time alone to get myself under control; I could hear the doctor talking to Steve and Bruce outside the door. The reality of it all had finally set in and the corners of my eyes burned with imminent tears. They were quiet as they came in, Steve sat on the other side of the bed, pulling me into his arms and kissing my forehead. I leaned into him, resting my head on his broad chest and listening to his heartbeat for a long moment before I raised my head again to see his face.

"I'm sorry, Steve. I didn't even know-" a choked noise escaped me.

He smiled at me, but it didn't reach his eyes. "It'll be okay, Sarah. Do you want me to call your parents for you?"

"In a little while, when we know more. Mom and Dad are still on vacation in Colorado; it's only 3 am, so they're probably still sleeping. I'll call them after this is all over and done with."

Another contraction gripped me, and Steve rubbed my back as I waited it out. "I'm sorry Sarah. I'm never going to put you through this again."

"Somehow I think you aren't the first man to ever say that, Steve." I panted as it passed.

Just then Dr Casey came in with the ultrasound machine. Steve moved to stand by Bruce as she pulled the blankets up over me and I moved the gown up so she could squirt the warm gel on my still flat belly. She moved the wand over me and I saw something that I'd never truly expected to see. At 5 weeks, I should only see a very small cluster of cells. Instead, what we saw was about the size of a golf ball. The doctor clicked on the screen a couple times, taking measurements and pictures. I reached for Steve's hand, squeezing it hard; I couldn't tear my eyes from the screen. That tiny little thing was our baby.

"Well, you certainly are pregnant, Sarah, but as you suspected, you're in the process of miscarrying. Your membranes must have ruptured, because there is little to no amniotic fluid left. If I had to estimate based on the fetus' measurements, I would say that you are measuring little over 13 weeks along."

"That fits with the Genesis data, Sarah," said Bruce quietly as I stared at the screen. "Based on that information, the fetus has developed more rapidly than average – maybe twice as fast."

My heart sank, knowing that my odds of having a baby at all was now considerably lower. "I was hoping that wouldn't be the case, Bruce. It took fifty tries to make me possible, after all."

"True, but that's without taking your Stark genetics into consideration. Howard and Tony were both only children, as are you."

"True, I hadn't thought of that; Stark's aren't exactly a prolific bunch. So this isn't just because of Genesis?"

"No, I don't think so. While a large portion of those miscarriages happened in the 4-8 week range, average women miscarry as well."

"You are correct, Dr Banner. 20-30% of women miscarry during that time. Most often, they just think it's an irregular cycle with heavier bleeding. Unfortunately, it looks like you went into labor since the fetus is more developed than anticipated." She put the wand back on the stand.

"Can you tell why?"

She nodded. "It's central nervous system isn't developing, so your body is releasing it. I'm sorry, but it would never have lived."

I looked over at Steve, who was rubbing the bridge of his nose. Another contraction hit, this one stronger than the last one. I rolled on my side and curled up, a whimper escaping my lips. Steve rubbed my back.

"Breathe, Sarah. Nice, deep, breaths. You can do this."

Dr Casey looked over at me, watching until it passed. "That looked a little stronger. I'm going to get my nurse and some supplies and I'll be back in a little bit to see how you're progressing. I would normally give you something for the pain, but I understand you metabolize most drugs too quickly for them to be effective?"