Hello Sergeant (Bucky Barnes)

Time's Up

James' POV

I ran my metal hand lightly over Sarah's face and she closed her eyes, letting me trace her features. She skimmed her fingers over my cybernetic arm, tracing the lines of the reticulations and the outline of the red star on my shoulder.

I closed my eyes and smiled as her hand skimmed down my biceps, along my forearm until her small hand covered my own. She lifted my palm from her face and kissed it before intertwining her fingers with mine. I felt her glance up at me when her phone buzzed on the table. She picked up the phone and read the message before setting it back on the table.

"Time's up?" I asked, my throat tightening.

"Something like that," Sarah agreed. "He'll be here in 10 minutes or so."

I let her crawl off me and moments later the lights were back on. She went into the kitchen and I heard her filling a glass with water. I stretched out on the small couch, one leg on the ground, the other hanging off the end. She leaned on the doorway, just looking at me for a long moment, sipping her water.

"What are you thinking?"

I was always curious about what was going through her head. I sat up to make room for her on the couch. She looked like she was considering what she was willing to tell me. She was always honest with me, but I knew she edited what she told me at times.

She exhaled loudly and took a deep breath before answering. "A lot of things. I'm hoping that this time you'll remember Steve when you wake up in the morning. I'm hoping that things between you two are like they used to be. I couldn't imagine what it would be like to lose Jace. My heart hurts just thinking about it. Honestly, it would be easier to die myself than to deal with that kind of pain."

"He's a good kid," I stated. "I'm proud to claim him as family."

I really was. Jace reminded me of myself at that age, confident and ready to take on the world. His and Sarah's relationship was still strange for me to see and it wasn't just because he looked more like me than I did. They genuinely cared for each other in a platonic way I hadn't thought was possible between a man and woman that weren't related. Around him she was a different person, softer - more playful. 

She smiled fondly. "I'm glad you two hit it off, even if it was a little weird to see you both together at first." Her smile faded. "But seriously, I've watched Steve mourn you, James. It may have been almost 70 years ago, but to him, it was like it happened just a couple months ago. Seeing you alive is going to be a bit of a shock, and I'm really concerned about what this will do to him." She walked over to the couch and sat down, turning to face me, worry in the frown lines between her eyes. "I'm also worried about how this will affect you, James. I'm afraid that it could be too much for you, too."

"It's just a chance I'm going to have to take," I sighed. "I want to remember, but at the same time I'm scared of what I might remember." I reached over and took her hand, needing to touch her, to ground myself.

"Hopefully it's only the good stuff." She smiled, squeezing my hand.

"Will you stay?" I felt the panic starting to rise in me at the thought of meeting someone that was supposed to be important to me but I had no memories of whatsoever.

She looked up at me, searching my face. "If you want me to, I will." She brought a hand up to my face. "You can do this, James. I know you really don't remember, but he's missed you so much."

"I want you to stay with me. I'm not ready to do this on my own."

I wanted to believe that meeting him would help me remember. He must have been important to me for Hydra to do such a thorough job of blocking him from my mind. Even when I did remember something, the memories never stayed permanently, slipping away when I slept. I pulled her back onto my lap and kissed her gently, not wanting to let her go, but knowing I had to. When she slid off me to sit next to me, it felt like goodbye.