My Head in Knots

Sometimes

Sometimes my heart 

Fills up with blood

And it pours over

My cracked ribs

It soaks up in 

My lungs and swallows 

My being

Sometimes tears

Sting my eyes

And my cheeks

Turn crimson 

And my stomach 

Is filled 

With rocks

Of pain

And sadness

And guilt

My head screams

With thoughts

And ghosts 

And ghouls 

And sounds

Telling me 

To jump

From that roof

I used to cherish

That roof

Which held

My happiness

And hope

And love

And is now empty

Because they turned into

Ghosts

And ghouls

And hollows

Sometimes

I let

The gray take

Over

I sit still

And become one

So that it may

Manifest

In me

I let

Him in

Because he is

The only love I know

Because what I once had

Was never truly

Mine 

And I

Am gone