It's not love if it doesn't destroy you

What If Part 1

Chapter 11
Part 1
What if what if WHAT IF....
Merediths pov
I'm sitting on the couch finishing up some work while thinking about who that woman is that answered Derek's phone. I had a gut feeling that Derek cheated on me, when you hear hoofbeats think horses not zebras. I snap my head towards the door because of someone at the door really trying to get in . Who the fuck is at my door at this time of night they are going to wake up the kids. I open the door and long behold there's Derek shepherd my cheating husband or at least I think he is my cheating husband

D: you called and a women answered my phone

M: I called and a woman answered your phone

D: Meredith we are in trouble I came home to work on us

M: I'm not buying that Derek why would you just randomly show up in the middle of the night it makes no sense. The only possibility that I can think of is that you cheated on me. So just tell me if you did or not because all night people have been trying to talk me off a ledge and have been giving me other scenarios of why a woman could have answered your phone but honestly the only possibility that I see here is that you cheated on me

D: Meredith you are the love of my life I just want you to know that, but if you want the truth then yes I slept with the women who answered my phone, it was only a one night stand and a huge mistake. I love you so much I'm so sorry Meredith

At this point Derek was crying and I was in shock, I knew he had cheated, I just hoped that it would be a whole misunderstanding but when it comes to me my nightmares always seem to become reality. Dark and twisty Meredith will once again takeover and stay strong.

M: how the fuck could you do this to me, after everything , we have both survived the inevitable. Why Derek why how why ugh why would you do this to us. You got to go work for the president and do your dream job while I stayed back and took care of the kids while committing to a full time surgical career. I was going to call and tell you that I'm on a streak and that I have saved 89 patients in a row. I was going to call to tell you that we are on a streak and that we would be able to make it together because I love you and you are the love of my life and the father of my children. But then you cheat on me because what I didn't follow your tail to DC because I stood up for myself, did you cheat on me for revenge or is this just simply because I'm not hot and young enough for you now. Honestly, even if I'm not enough I thought this kids would be. Are you just bored and wanted to get a fresh start once again. Like when will you have enough.

D:
Meredith I love you and you are the most hot beautiful sexy women I have ever laid eyes on, I'm not surprised that you were able to keep the fort down when I went away you are the strong one. I didn't cheat to get back at you or because I was bored it just happened and immediately after it happened I regretted it. You are amazing and I can't live without you you are everything you and the kids I love you and our family can you please give me a second chance 

M: No Derek I can't trust you anymore , you could have just came back to do the right thing in your mind and try to save our marriage , you could have your next love back in DC. You changed me for the better showed me what love is like and what a family is and now we have two beautiful children. I now know that I deserve someone who wouldn't just let something happen and be unfaithful. After everything Derek I thought it would be me and you and the kids forever. We made promises and wrote our vows on a post it. You have broken our vows and have broken our family. I love you but I have to put the kids first and I'm not going to pretend to love a man who couldn't reciprocate. We will figure out what will happen with the kids another day now get out of the house and leave

D: Meredith you can't do this we are married we have kids, you are the love of my life. ( Derek was now breaking down and the tears kept coming) Meredith please I'm begging you please take me back. It just happened I ended up getting kinda drunk but I regret it , sleeping with you making love with you is all that I desire please Meredith