Bold Bella (Book 4)

Chapter 12:

“Bella, I wish things were different between us.”

            “I know. Me too,” I finally admitted to him and I could feel his surprise.

            “But-”

            “Let me get this out,” I said suddenly stopping and turning to face him, “I know I always said I just wanted to be friends and that we were just friends but I was stupid and wrong and in denial. I need you. I want you. Any day I don’t talk to you is a bad day and I don’t know if I love you yet but I’m definitely falling and it sucks because you’re with Anna and I’m doing everything I told myself to never do. I’m falling in love with a guy. With you. And I can’t help it. I want to talk to you all the time and sometimes, like right now, when we’re talking I just want to kiss you. The sad thing is if I had realised all my feelings before we could’ve had it all.”

            “Bella, I love you. How could I not? You’re you and it sucks that we aren’t together. And you’ve been holding me back. I can’t love Anna because I love you. When I wake up in the morning you’re the person I think of. When I’m with Anna I’m thinking of you. I can’t get you out of my head and it sucks because my distraction isn’t working. Anna isn’t working.”

I didn’t know what compelled me to do it. Maybe because he told me he loved me or maybe because it was something I had wanted to do in forever. But I grabbed his shoulders and kissed his lips. When Niall placed his hands on my hips I pulled back.

            “I shouldn’t have done that,” I said immediately taking a step back from Niall and my fingertips lingered over my mouth like the kiss did.

            “No,” he said and my heart sunk a mile down into hell, until he stepped forward. My heart missed a beat and it felt like the world was spinning. Nothing else mattered a part from Niall and I. He stepped closer, until his body was an inch from mine. His hands cupped my face gently and I leaned into it closing my eyes and savouring the moment. “I should’ve,” he said.

His lips were on mine in that moment and my hands hesitated to push him back because I wanted the kiss to last forever but they did. I pushed him back.

            “You’re with Anna,” I managed to get out turning away from him but he grabbed my hand and turned me back around and pulled me into him so I slammed against him and my hands landed on his chest in surprise. His hands were pressing our bodies tightly together and our faces were as close as possible without kissing, our foreheads resting against each other. My heart was hammering like a woodpecker and I was sure Niall could feel it.

            “I want you,” he said before slamming his lips on mine.

He swung me down so the only thing that was keeping me from hitting the floor was his arms around my waist. In the haste, and surprise, my arms went around his neck at first rigidly. But as our lips moved together in perfect harmony my grip slackened until they were just loosely around his neck. He straightened me up and I smiled into the kiss. We were blissfully happy and I would never forget it. But then we saw the flash of a camera.

            “Oh crap,” Niall muttered leaning back. “We better get back inside.”

I felt sicker and sicker when I thought about what I had just done. I had that feeling in my stomach like I was about to throw up so when Niall grabbed my arm I snatched it back.

            “Just. This never happened,” I said.

            “Bella don’t be stupid,” Niall said and I could tell he was hurt. “This was probably the best thing that happened to me all year. Look lets go inside and we can talk.”