Storm. || Zen/Hyun Ryu

[11]: zen.

[ Sunday ]

I was rested on my bed, the TV in front of me switching channels as I pressed on the remote. My stomach grumbled the fifth time today, causing me to groan and mutter out a curse.

I basically skipped dinner yesterday because I knew I couldn't afford it. I rubbed my belly, a sigh following.

Still staring at the TV, my mind drifted into thoughts.

I need a part time job.

I needed one really badly, but I'd have to manage study sessions and working at the same time. The thought of it just sounded stressful.

I eventually gave up on finding a channel to watch and just turned it off. I dropped the remote on the table before taking my backpack to reach for my wallet. I took out a five dollar bill, then placing it back. I grabbed my phone, the bill and the key card, and left the motel.

After locking the room, I exited myself to the outdoors.

* * *

I laid my five dollar bill on the stand, my eyes still examining the board full of options. The middle-aged man finally noticed me, a friendly grin shaping his mouth. "Hello! What would you like, young man?"

I returned his smile, sliding the bill closer to him. "Goldfish-shaped bread, please?"

He simply nodded and turned around to get a bag and the freshly made bread, then neatly putting in a few napkins. He handed the bag to me, taking the bill from the stand. "Have a nice day."

"You too," I said before turning around to leave. I placed one of my hands in my pocket, the other holding on to the bag of bread. I took a bite of bread.

After walking around a bit, I finally decided on roaming around town. I could be doing my homework, but my grades were already too low to be fixed. There was no point.

I hungrily took another bite, munching down the piece quickly. I didn't know how hungry I actually was until I ate something.

With that, more negative thoughts came barging in my head.

This is what you have to deal with for running away,

You're so stupid,

You really are good for nothing.

My expression hardened when I saw a familiar face out in the distance. The guy noticed my gaze, causing his face to light up.

"Hyun!"

I spun my foot around to turn the other direction and speed walk out of his sight. I could hear footsteps getting louder as seconds passed by, which caused me to walk even faster.

A tight grip fastened on the arm I held my bread in, turning me around. I came in contact with a pair of hazel eyes I'd grown to be afraid of. I flinched.

"What the hell do you want?" I hissed, my eyebrows lowering into a furious and intense look. I tried to intimidate him with my angry look, but deep inside there was fear slowly filling my chest.

My brother looked down to take a few seconds to examine my facial expression, as his softened. He opened his mouth in attempt to say something, but nothing really came out. I tilted my head to indicate I was anticipating an answer.

He sighed and shook his head, his grip on my arm slowly loosening. "We've been looking for you..." He finally said, his voice trailing off. He sounded somewhat guilty.

I snatched my hand away from his grasp, swallowing the lump in my throat. "I'm not coming back."

"Yeah? And how are you going to support yourself?" He questioned, a skeptical look on his face. "Just come back home, we can pretend nothing ever happened--"

I took a step back from him, "No."

He stays silent, as I turned around to continue walking. He stood in place for a moment, but eventually followed me once again.

"No? Come on." I turned my head to look at him. What I hated about him the most was that he always looked at me like some sort of joke.

"Just leave me alone, is that so hard?" I growled, a bit of desperation in my voice. "Being in the same house as you all had made me feel like the biggest failure.. You all had belittled me to the point I learned to hate myself. And you seriously expect me to come back? I'm going to grow up living a better life, just wait and you see."

He scoffs at this, "Successful? With an acting job? It should've stayed a hobby, and you know that."

"No, I don't know that," I admit. ".... Just go, please. Isn't it what you all had wanted? For me to to just leave because I would ruin your guys' reputation?"

His gaze goes to the ground for a moment to think. "Fine. But we were just telling you the truth. You will not earn much from having a 'talent' like that."

With that, he turned around and left me alone-- just as I had wanted. I took a deep breathe and finally took another bite of bread, a sad and uneasy feeling stuck in my throat. I hated him. I hated him so much.

I forced myself to walk, taking a few last bites of the bread every once in a while. Little did I know, someone from across the street was watching me.

* * *

i can barely write anything, someone give me some inspiration T_T

+ how's the new cover?