Fred and George and the Toilers of Trouble (Year 1) ✔

Chapter 7:1

GREGORY THE SMARMY

Nearly every day of their first week at Hogwarts, the formerly famous twins, Fred and George Weasley, had done little more than what could be considered housework. Due to their blatant disobedience, their time away from lessons was spent with the wardens of the school, the house-elves. Before they had released the Dungbombs, the twins had never spent more than a few seconds with those scrawny little beasts, with ears like bats and noses that closely resembled long, grayish root vegetables. Their swollen, unblinking eyes reminded the boys of the many green apples that littered the paddock behind the Burrow. Most of the wizarding community was accustomed to house-elves, because they owned at least one. Especially the older, pure-blood families (which, naturally, excluded the miserably poor). Elves were very useful beings because they lived for generations, and nearly all of them appreciated their servitude. They were generally silent, moved about swiftly, and dressed in nothing but sackcloth. Seeing them in anything else was rare, since house-elves only wore clothes to denote their freedom from a wizarding family.

The keeping of house-elves was a barbaric sort of custom, but the relationship between wizard and elf carried on fruitfully without dissention from either side. This was a fortunate deal for the wizard, as Fred and George soon understood. Though weak in appearance, house-elves were capable of very potent magic — unspoken enchantments that could be executed with the simplest of gestures. Sadly, their abilities were restricted to such tasks as scrubbing deep toilets and reaching for cobwebs in high corners. The twins had learned during the week that keeping a clean castle was easy with a few, well-timed spells. Unfortunately for them, the guidelines of their punishment strictly forbid the use of magic.

After Mr. Filch led them to the kitchen, the twins were brought under the tutelage of the High Elf, a house-elf named Dandy. He had earned the name from his stitched, oxford dress shoes that were far too large for his feet. Answering the first question out of their mouths, Dandy proudly explained to Fred and George that he had received the oxfords from a previous Minister of Magic after discovering his scarf on the grounds during a very cold January afternoon some years back. Although the gesture was meant to result in Dandy's freedom, the oxfords were not considered clothes and thus did not constitute a lawful release from servitude to Hogwarts School. Therefore, Dandy continued working at the castle, and was elevated by his fellows to the ranking of High Elf. His job not only consisted of organizing the day's activities, but included doling out punishments to less-than-obedient students.

The schedule was as follows: Wake up at dawn and report to Dandy in the kitchen where they would prepare breakfast. After the meal was finished in the Great Hall, the boys were permitted to eat, but they could only share a few bites because there were wobbling piles of dishes to scrub and sort. This cycle was repeated for lunch and supper, and then came the real punishments. Before they were allowed to return to their dormitory, the twins had to clear the blackboards, tidy up the misplaced library books, mop the Entrance Hall floor, dust the school trophies, dispose of all fireplace ashes, sanitize anything Peeves the Poltergeist had soiled, and trim the nails of a partially covered, six-legged monster that Professor Kettleburn had sleeping in the dungeon. When Saturday arrived, and the Weasleys were finally allowed to eat a warm breakfast in the Great Hall, they were extremely grateful and not the least bit interested in mischief.