Fred and George and the Toilers of Trouble (Year 1) ✔

Chapter 19:7

"I would like to humbly request that no more questions be posed about my standing as a spirit of unyielding darkness," droned Professor Binns from the front of the History of Magic classroom, causing a dozen students to lower their waving arms.

"He told us you would say that..." muttered Fred with a conniving grin.

Binns coughed into his silvery, translucent handkerchief and drifted to the podium.

"Your Defense Against the Dark Arts instructor is vastly ignorant of the facts. I am neither a poltergeist, nor a specter of which you need to fear. I am, and have always been, a Hogwarts teacher. The reality of my situation, that I currently reside at the anterior of the afterlife, should have no bearing on my ability to impart upon you at least a limited degree of historical knowledge."

"What about the treasure?" George inquired, all but ignoring his statement.

"What is your question...er...Gary?"

"Everyone's been saying there's a treasure at the school, and how that's the real reason he's here."

Professor Binns perused the bindings of a few books on a shelf at the back of the lecture hall before choosing his preferred text. He thumbed through it casually.

"I cannot say that I've heard of a treasure at Hogwarts, though I am aware that the founder's crypts were ransacked," said Binns drearily. "It was thirteen ninety-four. Precious items belonging to Godric Gryffindor were pilfered from his crypt. Upon discovering the theft, a decision was passed down that it would be moved, along with the crypts of the other two founders, to a secret location."

"What about the fourth crypt?" asked an eager student from Hufflepuff.

Binns sighed and closed the book. "Salazar Slytherin was not laid to rest at Hogwarts. He abandoned the castle after a disagreement between him and Godric Gryffindor over the inclusion of Muggle-born wizards into the school."

"So...no treasure then?" asked George.

"Perhaps, Gerald," Binns replied slowly, clearly unaccustomed to being asked questions. "Many of the ghosts believe that the castle was here before the founders modified it with classrooms and dormitories. But none have been deceased long enough to say for certain. The only incorporeal beings who were even around at the time are the older paintings. They see everything, you know."

As their semi-conscious professor silenced half the class with his ongoing lesson on Uric the Oddball's masterworks, which included the self-stirring cauldron, the other half of the class struggled to stay awake. His low, monotone voice famously had such an effect, and the twins typically used that time to catch up on the sleep they had missed due to Quidditch practice. But Fred and George were more alert than ever in that moment, because Ol' Binnsy had just told them everything they needed to know.

"Parsimonae is definitely here for the treasure," said Fred pointedly, from behind their book. "See, no one else knows. But we were there at the Hog's Head Inn on the day they were doing interviews for the job. He wasn't interested in teaching then, and he isn't now."

"Right — it wasn't until he saw us...and the map," George agreed. "He even asked if it was a treasure map!"

"I can't believe Montague was right. There's a treasure hidden here, at Hogwarts, and the Magical Investigator is using the case of the ruined paintings as an excuse to go looking for it. That's why he wants the map, and why he asked Madam Pince for a list of all the portraits at the castle. Parsimonae must be looking for the oldest ones — the paintings that would have details about the treasure."

"And you heard him, Fred. He was trying to get information out of them on the night of the flood."

"Then why erase them?"

"What's to stop the portraits from telling someone else what they know? Or what he's up to. If he wanted to keep the treasure a secret, he would have to destroy them, wouldn't he?"

"I've got it! He must have found that missing potion vial from the shop on Knockturn Alley!"

"Ramkins Magical Oddities! Of course! That looney bloke said his potion could erase the memory of his photographs. I'd wager it works on paintings, as well."

"Precisely," said Fred, trying to piece it all together. "Parsimonae accepted the case. Then, when he found the stolen potion, he transferred it to a different bottle and returned the empty vial to Ramkin, knowing he could use it to threaten the paintings into talking. At that point, all he had to do was gain access to the school, which he's done brilliantly."

"Don't forget, the first thing he asked Ramkin was how the man would be paying for his services. If Parsimonae's a Ministry official, he wouldn't need to be paid to take on the case," George concluded. "Their family must be desperate for money."

"Well, they're not the only ones with coinage problems," Fred affirmed, taking that moment to scratch a nagging itch at the torn collar of his robe. "Maybe we ought to find it first...give it to Mum and Dad."

George was nodding excitedly. "If he wants the map because it could lead him to the treasure, maybe it'll work the same for us!"