Let Down (Being Heavily Edited)

chapter one

❝How much pain do you have to go through before giving up is okay?❞

---Beyonce

Aanvi Zenobia Henderson

Today's a new day, I thought as I went through my clothes deciding what to wear. I didn't have much to decide from but I wanted to look my best anyway.

Sighing in frustration, I sat in the pile of clothes now annoyed I couldn't find anything to wear. Grabbing my phone I went to the messenger app clicking on my sister's name.

Can't find anything to wear, have fun without me.

I sent the message and leaned back feeling my mood go down. Not even thirty seconds passed before I heard the Facebook call come through. I sighed already knowing who it was.

"Yes?" I answered preparing myself.

"What do you mean you have nothing to wear? Just throw on anything, who are you trying to impress?" Cailee asked.

"Nobody, but I still at least want to look presentable."

"Nobi, you'll be perfect if you come with some sweats and a shirt."

I did a closed-mouth smile at her compliment and rolled my eyes. I just knew she wasn't going to let this go, I sighed letting her talk me into going out.

I hung up the call trying to pick an outfit out, once again. I barely had clothes or shoes but I only noticed it when it was time to go somewhere. I threw my head back in frustration deciding to go through my mom's closet for some jeans.

I picked an all-black shirt, with jeans and black crocs. I looked out, hoping my mother wasn't there; after seeing she wasn't I made a beeline for the door.

I started walking to the bus stop looking around clutching the bottom of my shirt. I sat down at the bench where a lady along with her child sat talking to each other. I smiled listening to their conversation, I couldn't wait to have kids of my own.

The bus shortly came as I got on showing the bus driver my bus pass and walking towards the middle looking out the window. I watched as everything passed me getting into deep thought.

I stopped once I saw my stop coming up, I pressed the button still sitting until the bus stopped moving. I said excuse me not wanting anyone to get smart with me today.

I knocked on Lee's door seeing her come to the door smiling, I laughed rolling my eyes. It was impossible to be in a bad mood around her, she wouldn't let you even if you tried.

"See look at you, beautiful without even trying sis." She smiled pulling me into a hug.

"Where are we going again?" I asked sitting on the chair in her room.

"Going to the drive-in, they're playing Black Phone than maybe applebees." She squealed making me sigh.

"I only have five, and I need two fifty to get home afterward." I put my head down.

"When have I ever ate without you eating? If I have it then you will always have it. You're my sister and you should never feel any other way."

"Thanks." I smiled still having my head down. "And why are we going to a drive thru movie without a car?" 

"Because you can also put a blanket in the grass." 

"Alright, our Lyft is on the way. How do I look? Change my lip color or not?"

Cailee had on a denim button up shirt with ripped jeans, a black and grey fur vest and suede knee high boots. She let the pins go in her hair as the curly weave she had installed went down her back with light pink lip gloss.