((What if Sebastian and Ciel switched roles?))
Sebastian: *sitting at a desk wearing fancy noble clothes* *hears a knock* Come in~
Ciel: *comes in, carrying a tray with a pissed-off expression and a small suit with his hair slicked back* I somehow got the souls of a thousand dead children or whatever you wanted for lunch.
Sebastian: *frowns at Ciel over his book* How come you're not wearing your uniform?
Ciel: *frown deepens* What uniform??
Sebastian: The one I gave you yesterday.
Ciel: Yesterday...? *eyes widen* AWWW HELLLL NO.
Sebastian: *nods with an innocent smile* Oh, Hell indeed~
Ciel: NOPE. NO WAY. NOT GONNA-
Sebastian: I order you to go and wear it.
Ciel: ...
Sebastian: ovo
Ciel: ....
Sebastian: OVO
Ciel: I HATE YOU! *flings the tray at the window, hitting Mey-Rin in the face*
Mey-Rin: GAHHH!! *falls off the second-story window*
Sebastian: *gives Ciel a look*
Ciel: *sniffs and shrugs* She's okay.
Mey-Rin: *from the ground outside* I'M NOT OKAY!!
Ciel: *leans out the window* MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS, YA FOUR-EYED PLUM!!
Sebastian: *gives Ciel another look*
Ciel: *stomps out of room* DAMN YOU!!
Sebastian: *smirks* It's a little too late to say that, now, isn't it?
[A Few Minutes Later...]
Ciel: *reemerges in the room, wearing a large cat-mascot costume* I. HATE. YOU.
Sebastian: *corners of mouth twitches* Ah. I see it fits perfectly.
Ciel: SHADDUP!! >:V
Sebastian: Now, go fetch me a cat.
Ciel:... Wat.
Sebastian: Go fetch me a-
Ciel: BITCH, I AIN'T NO ZOOKEEPER!!
Sebastian: ...
Ciel: *puts hands on hips and snaps in front of Sebastian's face* BESIDES, I BE ALL ALLERGIC AND SHIZ!!
Sebastian: *pouts and pretends to rub eyes* Oh boo hoo hoo. I'd say go cry to your parents, but it seems-
Ciel: DON'T EVEN START!! *angrily turns around and waddles out of the room, muttering as he tried to fit through the doorframe*
Sebastian: *waits till he's gone, then smiles evily* Ahh. It seems he fell for my trap. And now that he's distracted...
Sebastian: It's time for my real plan to begin~
[Outside of the Michaelis Manor...]
Ciel: *is huffing and puffing* I... I ain't no... No zookeeper... *suddenly sees a cat* Hey! There's one of those ugly gitfaces that my Butt-Faced Butler is obsessed with!
Cat: *spraying all over the roses*
Ciel: Wat's it doing? *squints, then realizes* OIIIII!!! *waves arms* AYE!! AYE YOU, YEAH YOU! CAPTAIN TUBBY MCANUSHOLE!!! GET AWAY FROM THEM FLOWERS!! *waddles towards the cat*
Cat: *continues to pee while staring at Ciel*
Ciel: YOU WANNA GO?? YOU WANNA GO??
Ciel: *puts up cat-paw fists* DEN FIGNT MEH!!!!!
Round one
FIGHT!
Ciel: *tried to kick the cat but ends up falling over*
...
Cat Wins!!!
Cat: *walks up to Ciel* ??
Ciel: *starts sneezing* AUGH! GET AWAY FROM ME, YOU LITTLE HAIRY TURD!! *tried to get up, but realizes he can't because of the cat suit* ?!
Cat: ...
Ciel: ...
Cat: ...
Ciel: *sneezes*
Cat: * sits on Ciel's face and pees on him*
Ciel: AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! *screams in agony*
Will Ciel survive?
What is Sebastian planning??
Is Tubby McAnusHole really a hairy turd?
TO BE CONTINUED
YOU ARE READING
Black Butler CRACK~
Fanfiction(Has gotten ranked #152 in humor!) I created almost all of these myself from scratch, so I'm quite proud. PLEASE DO NOT COPY!!!!!! Read. I promise you that you will regret it. But in the best way~
