Too Many Secrets To Hide | ✔| #Wattys2017

Chapter Eighteen

Word Count: 3129

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   Christopher came up with the brilliant idea to head straight for the road instead of walking back the way we had came. We were now going the same direction I had taken Bel when we escaped. The idea was to notify the doctor to pick us up by the road so that I could get to the infirmary faster. We were essentially doing the exact thing Bel and I had done.
  
   It would have been much faster if I had been able to shift, but Mark wouldn't have that. He said that my human blood was the only thing keeping me alive, and that if I shifted into my wolf, I would die instantly. He kept talking about how I should be dead anyway, Christopher only agreed while Jasper remained silent.
  
   What was Jasper's problem anyway? The moment I need him the most, the time that I'm dying slowly and very painfully at that, and he couldn't so much as lend a hand of comfort? That was fine, I didn't need him anyway. It was just like I always said; sooner or later, everyone will let you down or leave you. Jasper was no different.
  
   Well, maybe he was heartless and a pig, but I wasn't. I would say my final 'goodbye's' and 'I love you's' before I died. I decided to call Bel. She had no idea where I was or what I was doing. I hadn't told her so as not to raise her suspicions or have her wanting to come. That, I would not have allowed. I pulled out my phone and struggled to find her contact. I hit the call button and shoved the phone up to my ear.
  
   "Cadence, where are you?" my little sister's worried voice came across the line. I would have chuckled if I had had the strength. This poison was really working fast. "Bel, listen. Christopher's pack attacked Derek and his men. I went with them and..." my voice trailed off. "Are you hurt, are you okay?" she asked frantically. The pain in her voice hurt me more than that poison ever could. I had to shut my eyes tight for a moment just to cope. "They sprayed me with... Wolfsbane," I said weakly. "A lot of it." The words barely came out.
  
   "Cadence!" she yelled into the speaker. "Cadence, please don't die, please don't die!" she pleaded, starting to cry, but I just couldn't tell her she had no reason to. "Bel, they don't know if I'm gonna make it. I'm sorry." She sobbed loudly, and I wanted so badly to weep with her. I didn't though, I had to stay strong for my baby sister. "I love you," I whispered, because I could not talk any louder. "Cadence..." she whimpered. "Ask Fiona to take you to the pack infirmary," I croaked.
  
   We were at the road now and I could see headlights approaching. Listening to Mark and Christopher talk, I knew it must be the doctor. "I have to go. I love you, Bel," I said as strongly as I could. "I love you too," she whispered. "Bye." I sniffled. "Goodbye, Cadence." I just barley heard her.
  
   I hung up first, because I knew she would hold onto that call as long as I would keep it open. I couldn't stand the thought of her listening to my dying breaths over the phone. That was absolutely out of the question. She had enough scars, and the last thing I did before I died would not be to add another one. No, the last thing I did before I died would be to get rid of the biggest threat to my little sister. I loved her more than the world, and a million times more than Jasper by now.
  
   The van with the doctor stopped in front of us. Mark whisked me into the back, I guess it was sort of an ambulance type deal. They laid me down on a mattress of blankets and took off as soon as the doors were shut. Christopher sat in the passenger seat next to the driver, while Mark and Jasper took the back with myself and the doctor. Mark explained what was going on while Jasper made a point out of not looking at me. Why did he even come back here then?
  
   The doctor asked me how I was feeling. "In a lot of pain and very weak," I replied vaguely. Through my half closed eyes, I saw him give a sad face to Mark and Jasper. Then, as if a light bulb had gone off in his head, he reached to push back the hair on my neck. Then he dropped his shoulders and his face went back to being grim again.
  
   "If she had a mate, I would say the mate bond through her mark might be able to save her- that in combination with receiving a little blood from him," the doctor sighed. When Mark and Jasper exchanged a glance, his eyebrows went up. "He's her mate," Mark said quietly. "He just hasn't marked her yet because she's half human. We don't know what it could do to her." Jasper looked at his feet before the doctor spoke up: "It could kill her or it could save her, but you might want to try it because the poison is going to kill her either way.
  
   Jasper locked eyes with him for just a moment, before looking back at me. Slowly, he moved to lean over me. He placed one big hand on my cheek, his eyes glistening with tears. He had to close them and turn his face away to keep one from falling out. Then he looked back at me with a pain I couldn't appreciate at the moment. "This is permanent, Jasper. Don't do anything you might regret." It was meant to come out as a sneer, but that was not how it sounded as I could raise my voice only just higher than a whisper.
  
   "There are only two times I will ever hurt you," Jasper began seriously. "And this is going to be one of them." I watched, horrified and curious, delirious as he lowered his head into the crook of my neck. Without notice or any kind of forewarning, his canines were piercing my skin. I gasped at the pain. Fire flooded my neck while he bit harder and harder. I was squirming so hard he had to hold me down.
  
   "Ow," I whined as he licked up the blood. When he finally pulled away, there was pity shining in his eyes. I rubbed the spot he had bitten me. It hurt so bad I just couldn't help but start crying. I tried not to, I really made an effort to hold back the sobs. But it just hurt. Jasper pulled me into his arms. "I'm sorry baby," he murmured gently against my hair. I whimpered and tried to lift my arms to his neck. I found that I wasn't strong enough for that though, and it just made me cry more. It didn't help that the effects of the poison were growing stronger, either. My whole body was just racked with pain, and that bite was the bitter cherry at the top of the cake. "Make it go away," I whined. I spotted the doctor holding a needle out of the corner of my eye, and I don't remember anything after that.
***
   "I just... I don't understand. I thought she had the biggest heart of anyone I'd ever met." It was Jasper who spoke. "And then the way she smiled when she killed him..." Christopher piped up. "How could she be like that? He was her father, evil or not," Jasper went on. "I don't really understand either," Mark added to the conversation. "I witnessed the killing of my own father, and I wasn't angry with you for doing it... But to have done it myself?"
  
   "She's dangerous," Christopher concluded. "She's like her father, cruel and cold hearted." I refrained the urge to open my eyes and start yelling. "You don't think..." Jasper trailed off. "That she would turn on one of us?" I gasped inwardly. Of course not! I had done what I had done to protect Bel, and Christopher's pack surely benefited as well.
  
   "I'm not sure," Christopher said sounding very sad. "Derek did kill his own wife who he professed to love. Who's to say his daughter, which is already displaying some of his sociopathic behavior, wouldn't at some point start turning on her loved ones as well- starting by murdering her own father?"
  
   I honestly couldn't believe what I was hearing. I was no monster- was I? No, I wasn't like my father. Or would I be some day? Clearly his reasoning for all this mess was wrong, but could he have been suffering at the hand of some sort of disease maybe? Could he have had a mental disorder that he passed down to me? Had all of his absurd notions began with more slight things. I had killed my own father, my wolf and I, that is, but what if there was something more? Was Christopher right, was I dangerous? Was I a threat to the pack?
  
   As all of those things bombarded my mind, I never once considered running away. Not until I realized something that would change my life forever. Not until I realized that leaving was my only option because, as much as it killed me, there was a possibility I would end up like dad. That made me a threat to Bel, just as my father had been. And I would stop at nothing to keep my baby sister safe.
  
   I opened my eyes. Looking to my right, I could see Jasper seated close to me. I immediately noticed the IV stuck in the inside bend of his elbow. I traced it all the way back to my own arm. It wasn't rocket science to know that the dark red liquid running through the tube was blood. My head rolled back against the pillow. I took a deep breath before turning back to the IV. Every eye in the room was on me. That was a total of six, Bel wasn't here yet. Evidently, I hadn't been out long and she hadn't arrived.
  
   I crashed my hand over top of the IV and ripped it out, taking nearly all my strength. "Cadence!" Jasper scolded me, but I was a little bit too dizzy to care. I found another IV in my left arm as I turned to stand. I jerked it out too. I hated IV's with a passion.
  
   "Cadence," Jasper said again, more sternly this time. I ignored him. I swung my legs around over the side of the bed. I was going to try to stand, but didn't make it that far before Jasper grabbed my shoulders and made me lay back down. He placed a hand on either side of me as he loomed over the bed. I glared up at him, but he didn't seem to mind. I crossed my arms over my chest and huffed as I looked away from him.
  
   "Go get the doctor and tell him she pulled the IV's out," Jasper said and Mark left the room. "I pulled them out for a reason," I smarted off. "They were there in the first place for a reason," he answered sounding annoyed, almost growling at me. I did not like that at all. I rolled my eyes. "I hate IV's," I huffed. "Well if you want to live- or at least not die in pain, you might want to decide you don't hate them so much anymore," he said through gritted teeth. I didn't say anything, I just gave him the most careless and defiant look I could. To be honest, now that I knew what I was, or possibly could become at least, dying and leaving Bel without me sounded like something I could live with.
  
   The doctor rushed back into the room, Mark trailing behind me. "That sedative should have kept her out for another two hours," he mumbled. I was already trying to get up again, but Jasper was holding me down by my shoulders. When the doctor saw it, he promptly left the room. With that I was satisfied, until he returned with a very familiar looking needle. "No no no," I whined, shying away from him as he came around the left side of the bed. Then I looked back up at Jasper. "I promise I'll be good, please don't let him do that," I pleaded, nearly to the point of tears. "No!" I shrieked and managed to knock the the hand holding the syringe away before he stuck me with it. I pushed myself towards the edge of the bed, closer to Jasper and away from that needle. 
  
   Finally, Jasper held his hand up to stop the doctor without looking at him, but keeping his eyes trained on me. "You promise you won't fight with us?" he asked. I nodded my head vigorously. Anything was better than getting put to sleep against my will. I couldn't stand the thought of not being able to keep myself from falling unconscious. "Alright," Jasper agreed and he released me from his grip.
  
   The doctor then set to work on the IV for my left arm. "What's that?" I asked nervously. "Morphine, for the pain," he explained. I pulled away before he could put the IV in again. "Cadence," Jasper warned. "I can deal with the pain," I stated tentatively as I looked from the doctor to Jasper. "That stuff makes me all dizzy and I don't like it," I pouted. I wasn't fighting, I was negotiating. Jasper rolled his eyes, but miraculously agreed to let me go without the pain killer.
  
   Not seeming particularly happy about it, the doctor moved over to the right side of the bed. I could remember him saying something about getting blood from my mate, but I still didn't quite understand. "Why is he giving me blood?" I asked, trying to sound inquisitive but I'm sure I came off as more skeptical. "We had to take a lot of blood from you to lower the level of wolfsbane in your system. Jasper was acting as a blood donner for you so you wouldn't die of blood loss." I suddenly noticed how drained Jasper looked.
   "Don't I have enough? I feel fine," I insisted. As much as I despised Jasper right now, I didn't want him sacrificing himself on my account. I wasn't worth it, not when I was a dormant monster. If I died, at least it would keep my potentially lethal self away from Bel.
  
   "Cadence, you said you wouldn't fight," Jasper cut in, obviously irritated. "But look at you, Jasper!" I whined pathetically. "I've got enough of your blood. I'll be fine." I gave him my best puppy dog face. "You're still missing a fifth of your blood," the doctor told me. "And how much has Jasper given me?" I asked almost snidely. The doctor sighed. "About a fifth," he admitted. The whole room fell silent, as my point had been made. "Fine, be that way!" Jasper yelled and stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him. I hated to have caused this tension in the air, but I was content with the overall outcome. I was no longer hooked up to any IV's and Jasper wasn't giving me any more blood.
  
   The doctor watched as Jasper left and then turned back to me to give a very disapproving look. I shrugged. "You're very strong willed," he commented less than enthusiastically. I smiled mockingly in response. "You're going to make a great Luna one day," he added. My smile fell then, because I would never be the Luna of this pack. "Thank you," I replied, but only in a sense of politeness and not at all sincerely. If the doctor noticed that, he didn't mention it before he walked out.
  
   Christopher sighed, but I think it was only to get my attention. I looked over at him in the corner of the room. "Why did you do that?" he asked curiously, not judgmentally or sounding upset, but inquisitive. "Because I didn't want Jasper getting hurt because of me," I explained, leaving out the part where I didn't care if I died. He nodded in understanding.
  
   We sat in awkward silence for a few minutes before Mark spoke up. "How are you feeling, now that most of that stuff is out of your system?" he asked. I knew now that I liked Mark more than Christopher, Jasper or the doctor. He was the first and only one to have asked me about my well being. "Pretty good, actually," I told him honestly. He nodded. "I wonder if your wolf would disagree," he mentioned thoughtfully. I too wondered about that, and I was going to shift to find out, but then I decided against it. I did not need to give either of those two a whiff of my wolf because she was how I would hide from them. I knew that she didn't have the same scent as my human, and hopefully they hadn't got to smell enough of the wolf yet to be able to track me.
  
   "When do you think the morphine will wear off?" I asked, mostly to change the subject. "It'll probably be a while," Mark chuckled. He seemed to be the only one conversing with me anymore. "I don't like the effect this stuff has on me," I complained. Mark continued to laugh. "You're gonna dislike that pain even more." I rolled my eyes at the comment. "Didn't they get most of the wolfsbane out?" I asked. "Yeah, but not all of it. It's gonna feel like food poisoning only all over, not just in you're stomach." That didn't sound good but it was better than being high on a painkiller.
  
   I decided that I wanted to try and stand again. Now that Jasper wasn't here to hold me down, I saw nothing in my way. I swung my legs over the edge of the bed. I pretended not to notice both Christopher and Mark eyeing me carefully. Slowly, I pressed my feet against the cold tile of the floor. I began to push myself up with my hands gripping the side of the bed. It proved to be a rather strenuous task, between how dizzy I was from the morphine and how weak I was from the blood loss and poison.
  
   "Careful," Mark said when I had finally reached my feet. He walked over to the bedside, supported me with one hand on the small of my back and the other on my arm. I tried a few steps, Mark not leaving my side. They were shaky and unstable, but he never let me fall. After I had gotten all the way across the room, Mark let go of me. He stayed close and would catch me if I started swaying too much, but I was pretty much walking on my own now.