Too Many Secrets To Hide | ✔| #Wattys2017

Chapter Nineteen

Word Count: 3174

The song above is for reference if you haven't heard the one Cadence talks about further on in the chapter.

   I was basking in the glow, walking all by myself, when someone had to walk in and ruin the vibe. I stood still as I stared at Jasper. It probably looked like I was really irritated at him, but I actually just didn't want him to see how much I still wavered when I walked. That would embarrass me more than his presence would annoy me.
  
   "Hey," he said with an exhale as if that one word lifted a hundred pounds off his shoulders. "Hey," I replied. "I uh... I shouldn't have stomped off like that," he confessed with one hand on the back of his neck and eyes wandering the floor. "I'm sorry," he finally said as he raised his gaze to meet mine. I made a point to stare him down for a minute. "You're forgiven," I told him at last. He smiled in evident relief.
  
   I tried to take in all his beautiful features as he smiled. He truly was gorgeous. The way one corner of his mouth always turned up more than the other. How the uppermost outside edges of his eyes were a darker blue than the rest, while they were swirled all around with shades even lighter.
  
   The way his very defined jawline ran into his cheeks and melted into high cheekbones that he showed off with the devious smirk of his. How he looked so sexy with that five o'clock shadow, which he had right now. Then there was his body. His perfect body. His chest that knew my face so well, containing his heart that beat like a lullaby for me. His arms that ached to hold me, almost as if nothing could ever be as satisfying as that. I wished he had his shirt off so that I could appreciate more of him, but his current form would have to do. I only wanted to examine him so closely in case this was the last time I saw him. I wanted to leave before Bel came, because once she got here I knew she would hardly let me out of her sight and just her presence would be temptation for me to stay. That couldn't happen though, I was a monster.
  
   "Here, why don't you sit back down," Jasper suggested, laying one hand over the small of my back and one on my arm to guide me towards the bed. I wondered why he was suddenly being sweet and touching me. It was probably just for my benefit. I had heard what he said talking to Mark and Christopher, he couldn't hide from me what he truly felt. Nonetheless, I let him sit me down on the bed and then seat himself next to me.
  
   I was currently devising my escape plan, unbeknownst to those around me. I glanced nonchalantly at the window. Ground level? Are you kidding me? Could this get any more perfect? "Boys, I would really like some time to myself right now, if you wouldn't mind?" I said just as innocently as I could. They all nodded and presently left the room. Well that was easy.
  
   I got up and hobbled towards the window, looking for a latch or a lock. I located it quickly and undid it with ease. I pushed up the glass as quietly as possible, which turned out to be pretty quiet. There was just enough room for me to slide out when I got the window all the way up. I took a quick observation of the surrounding area to make sure no one was watching before I swung my first shaky leg out. Using every ounce of strength within me, I shoved my other leg over and pushed myself down until I was dangling from windowsill. Not able to hold on anymore, I dropped to the ground and fell directly onto my butt.
   It hurt substantially, and I wondered if Jasper had felt that? Just in case, I took off at a sprint into the forest. I knew I needed to change into my wolf to cover the smell of my human, but if one scent led into another they would know it was my wolf. My plan had been to hitchhike to my house, then take my mothers car. I doubted Jasper would be able to track my scent if I was in a vehicle.
  
   I didn't slow my pace as I found the road. It was across a patch of woods, understandably, as an infirmary for a certain type of mythical creature couldn't be displayed openly, I'm sure. It was just lucky I happened to spot passing someone's headlights through the tree's or else I might have not found the road for quite some time. Except for the lights of the infirmary, it was pitch black darkness out here. That, of course, made my, however short, trek through the woods rather treacherous. By the time I came out from amongst the trees, I had picked up more than a few new scratches. I just hoped I didn't look too bad and appear suspicious.
  
   I ran along side the road for a few minutes before I spotted yet another set of headlights. At first it felt a little like deja-voos, but I realized the approaching vehicle was not one that I was familiar with. I stuck my thumb out over the road as he came closer. I knew the driver must have seen it, and my suspicions were confirmed when he came to a stop next to me. "Where to?" the tired looking, middle-aged man asked. "Anywhere but here," I replied urgently. "Get in."
   I walked around the pick-up truck and slid into the passenger seat. He shifted the truck into drive and mashed down the accelerator. I wanted to tell him to go faster, but how could I complain when I was at least getting a ride? So I kept my mouth shut.
  
   My eyebrows shot up just slightly when I saw the time on the dash, but I couldn't say I was surprised. It was 2:47 a.m. "So what's a girl like you doing wandering around this late?" the man asked, breaking the silence. I shrugged. "And in pretty rough condition, too," he added. I frantically tried to think up an explanation for my whereabouts while maintaining a cool and collected composure. "I got lost," I lied. Then I realized if I had truly gotten lost, my destination would not have been 'anywhere but here'. I devised a plan to cover for that quickly. "I'm actually running from someone," I said honestly and with a lack of remorse. There I go, acting like my father again. "Who?" he asked, sounding very concerned. "My boyfriend," I replied, and I wasn't sure if that was true or not. "I ran away with him a few days ago, but then some...things happened." That was almost true, I had left home and basically moved in with Jasper, and we were technically official. Wow, I was good at making the truth into a lie.
  
   "Aren't you trying to get back home then?" he questioned. "No, I can't go back," I responded. I almost said my parents were dead, but I didn't need this guy hauling me off to an orphanage. "My parents would never take me back." Of course, in reality, they couldn't because they were both dead. "You might be surprised," he commented. I sighed, as if I considering it. My plan had been to see if he would take me home in the first place, but I didn't need to climb into his car and beg to go home and seem so vulnerable. He seemed nice enough though. "But I don't even know where I am," I persisted half falsely. "After we turned off the highway, I just don't know where we went." I dropped my shoulders and lowered my head for effect. "Well I'll tell you what," he said. "I'll get you to the highway, and you tell me where to go from there." I looked up at him with hopeful eyes and smiled and nodded. "That sounds good," I all but beamed.
  
   After we got onto the highway, I navigated us to my home. During this time, Jasper called. I didn't answer and turned my phone off completely, and I was glad the man didn't ask any questions. "Thank you," I said genuinely as I stepped out the truck parked in my driveway. "You're welcome," was all he replied with before he drove away.
  
   I grabbed the spare key and unlocked the door to my house. I ran upstairs to my room to grab my life savings and a few other necessities that Jasper hadn't grabbed already. I tried to fight the urge to look around. Was it even my room anymore? This house didn't feel the same now that nobody lived here. It wouldn't be long before they foreclosed on it, wondering what happened to the family that used to live here. The parents just disappeared, and too bad no one really knows who the kids were. I let out a bitter chuckle as I realized I had committed the perfect crime.
  
   Grabbing the keys for the little gray Honda civic that sat out front, I exited the house, locking the door behind me and taking the spare key with me. I was glad the car was paid off and had insurance on it. That made my life so much easier. Of course, the title still wasn't in my name, but this thing would break down and I would be leaving it at some point anyway. The upside was that there was no one to report it stolen. Not unless Jasper had memorized the tag number while he was here stealing my clothes.
  
   Really, the only problem I had was that I wasn't exactly very good at driving. I had done it before, but I wasn't what you would call 'talented'. I started the car tentatively, putting it into drive as if it was the scariest thing I had ever had to do. But seriously, I had ran into the open arms of an evil werewolf and then killed that very one after finding out who he really was. How hard could driving a car possibly be? This would be the least of the challenges I had faced in the past couple of weeks.
  
   Suddenly though, I wasn't so irritated at the guy who had given me the ride for not having gone any faster. I was hardly doing twenty miles an hour down the road. It was just a good thing that it was late- or early- and almost nobody was out. This was particularly true on this street and the ones after it. Of course, that was almost nobody. I saw headlights approaching behind me. Not wanting to seem suspicious, I slowly increased the speed of the car until I was doing the speed limit of forty miles per hour. Much to my relief, the car turned onto a different road after a few miles and I was once again left alone. I did try to keep my speed up though, as paranoid as I was that I was going to hit something. I was heading for the highway, and I couldn't be doing twenty miles per hour there. I would get pulled over for going too slow, and then I'd really be in trouble.
  
   Miraculously, I made it to the interstate without crashing. I got on and stayed in the right-hand lane while other cars would pass me occasionally in the left. I was going slower than any of the other traffic, but nothing conspicuous.
  
   I drove for hours. I eventually got over my fear and was quite comfortable going down the road in pace with everyone else and the radio buzzing quietly. It was getting bright though. The clock said 7:17 and my stomach said 'time to eat'. I had a McDonald's gift card in my purse that I had been saving, and I decided now would be a perfect time to make use of it.
  
   After another few minutes of driving, I spotted those golden arches ahead. I went through the drive-thru, not wanting to get out and leave my scent all over the place on the off chance that Jasper made it this far. When I ordered, I just got a big Mac without fries and a water instead of soda. The big mac would never satiate my cursed large appetite, and fries certainly would have helped, but I didn't need the salt. I knew there was no way my blood levels were all the way back to normal, so the less sodium I consumed the better, for now.
  
   When I got to the pay window the guy just kind of looked at me like 'is that seriously what you ordered?'. He looked even more confused when I handed him the gift card. I could tell what he was thinking: Doesn't she know this would have paid for fries and a regular drink? There was ten dollars on the gift card, so I guess my order probably did seem a little strange. Oh well. He handed me the card back since it still had some money on it and I moved down to the food window. The girl there handed me a bag without another thought and let me go after a clearly mandatory 'have a good day'.
  
   I managed to park the car, even if it did take a few tries to get in the space straight. I ate my food in silence, as I had no one to talk too. About halfway through the meal, just as a safety precaution, I donned a pair of dark sunglasses which had previously suspended by the sun visor. I didn't need them, but they might help conceal my identity from anyone I saw who knew me. If nothing else, they would at least make me look older.
  
   After I finished eating, I pulled the car over to a trash can. I must have looked like an idiot, or someone who couldn't drive. I just didn't want to get out of the car was all. I threw my trash out through the window, successfully staying in the car the whole time. I also found that getting onto the road at around three in the morning was not the same as doing it now, at closer to eight. Now, the roads were busier and there where no mile-long gaps between cars. There were more than a few times I could have pulled out I think, but I was just so nervous. How this could possibly be more scary than evil werewolves and near-certain death, I still didn't know. What I did know, was that there were three cars behind me all wanting to leave McDonald's, so I took my chances. I whipped the car out onto the road and absolutely gassed it. I was very proud of myself for having done a good job of it, in my opinion. I did not cause any other cars to break and I didn't hit anything, so that was a good job, I thought. Smiling at my accomplishment, I once more fell into pace with the other traffic. I didn't know where I was going, but I had half a tank and I was headed in the opposite direction of my old life.
  
   Faintly, I heard a familiar song come on the radio. "A drop in the ocean, a change in the weather. I was praying that you and me might end up together," I sang. "Its like wishin' for rain as I stand in the desert, but I'm holding you closer than most...'cause you are my heaven."
  
   "A drop in the Ocean" by Ron Pope was one of my favorite songs, and hearing it now gave it new meaning. The weather had changed drastically, and I'm still wondering if by some miracle Jasper will find me and take me back. "Don't wanna waste the weekend, if you don't love me- pretend. A few more hours, then it's time to go." The hours had passed, I was gone.
  
   "And as my train rolls down the east coast, I wonder how you'll keep warm." It was ironic I was heading east and wondering how Bel and Jasper would cope with my disappearance, if only just Bel. "It's too late to cry, too broken to move on..." wasn't that the truth? "And still I can't let you be, most nights I hardly sleep," that was already happening. "Don't take what you don't need from me..." What they don't need is me.
  
   "Misplaced trust and old friends." That was perfectly accurate. "Never counting regrets." I couldn't, of course, for my sister's sake. "By the grace of God, I do not rest at all..." and I don't think I ever really would again. "New England as the leaves change." Did it have to be fall? "The last excuse that I'll claim," is that I'm a monster. "I was a boy who loved a woman like a little girl..." Jasper certainly was.

   I finished the song like that, pouring my heart into every note. I felt as if I could have written this song.
  
   A couple more hours driving, and I didn't even know what state I was in. I figured I would eventually make it to the beach, and there I would make a new start. I would get a job, abandon the Honda civic and buy myself a car that could have my name on the title- after I got my license, of course. I would have to kind of hide out for a while since I wasn't old enough to be out of school yet, but I would be soon. Then, I could legally drop out and at sixteen, I would be able to secure a half decent job. It most likely would not be much, but it would feed me.
  
   I spotted a gas station that was several cents cheaper than the last few I had passed. I decided I might as well fill up here. After I pumped my gas, I walked in to pay for it. I kept my sunglasses on, and I'm not sure if that's why the cashier eyed me so suspiciously or if he could still tell I was young even with my disguise. He looked to be about nineteen and luckily didn't say anything. While I was in the gas station, I purchased some snacks for the road. I made an effort to keep it low on the sodium and high in protein.
  
   I sighed as I pulled back out onto the road, it wasn't too crowded yet but it was almost noon. Noon meant lunch hour and lots of traffic, so I began mentally preparing myself for it. I suppose I would have to get used to it though, as I start my new life.