April 19th 1997
I tossed and turned on my bed for hours. I could not get comfortable on the scratchy sheets. A garbage truck roared by my window and the ceiling fan squeaked. That thing was gonna fall on me, I just knew it. Switching sides endlessly, I finally settled on my back.
My eyes were sticky with sleep, or lack of it I should say. My footie pajamas were a little toasty but not enough to keep me up at night. The buzzing silence after the truck left was killing me. I needed help. Someone to snuggle with. I needed...
I needed Angus.
Oh, he was probably asleep though. I didn't want to wake him up. But I missed him, sharing a room with him. The way his hair smelled, his warmth, his protectiveness, how his shoulder was a good pillow...
Ah, screw it.
I stepped out of bed and rearranged my hair that got tangled in my hood. After placing my hood back, I walked out of my room and down the hall.
I crept from door to door using what seldom moonlight I had to find Angus' room number. Right where it should have been was a black hole. His door was open. I didn't want to enter without his permission, though I couldn't even see him. A dim lamp in the corner shone on the couch. Smoke blew into the light then disappeared again. There he was. His leg was crossed over the other and his foot shook uneasily. His illuminated face was drowsy, but deep in thought. Eyes half closed, but focused. A cigarette played on his lips and a steady trail of smoke circled the dust from the lamp.
His eyes glanced up at me. I shifted the weight on each foot. "Angus?"
"What are you doing up?" he whispered.
"I uh, couldn't sleep." He stared at me. The cigarette in his hand was crushed in his fingertips and set on an ashtray. Never once his eyes left mine. I stood in the doorway wringing my hands together. "I wanted to see if you were up and...I'm sorry I'll-I'll go, I was just-I'll leave."
"No, wait." He stood up and came over putting an arm over my shoulders. "Stay. Please." I nodded. The door was closed behind us and we sat on the couch. "Couldn't sleep either. My uh-window's broken." I looked behind me and saw his window sealed shut. "Kept the door open to let the smoke out. Not my best idea but-" He laughed humorlessly. "It's put out now anyway."
Already I was getting sleepy. His warmth and the smell of smoke made me feel safe, and I wanted to sleep right there. "You said you couldn't sleep?"
"Yeah I-was tired but-"
"Somethin' botherin' you?" he asked rubbing my arm.
"Don't know. I guess."
"I can help. Well, don't know if I can but-" he chuckled. "I'll sure as hell try." I buried my nose in his arm and he wrapped them both around my waist. He lay down on the couch and pulled me on top of him so we were more comfortable. "Now. What's wrong?"
"Just missed you."
"Missed me?"
"Mhm."
"I'm right here."
"I missed sharing a room with you," I explained.
"Oh, I see. I missed you too. Has your lack of sleep been going on long?"
"No, just tonight."
"Lucky. Mine's been getting worse. Probably 'cause I miss you huh?" he laughed. I nuzzled into his chest and my breathing slowed. "Hey now, I can't sleep on the couch."
"Too bad," I mumbled. I curled up and fixed my tail so it wouldn't cause me discomfort 'back there'.
"I still don't see the excitement in these pajamas," Angus said feeling the ears on my hood.
"That's 'cause you haven't tried one." His hand went under the hood to brush my hair behind my ear. He palmed the back of my head, his thumb stroking my cheek. The other hand starting from my forehead, pet my hair back, pushing the hood off. "Hey, I fixed that."
"I couldn't see you under that, I wanted to see your face." His thumb drew circles on my cheek. "It's a nice face," he whispered. I chuckled a bit and he smiled. "I'm serious!" A yawn escaped me so I hid it in my hand. But as soon as I took my hand away, I sneezed from the dust. And that sneeze landed right on Angus.
His eyes were closed and he reached a hand up to wipe his face. I couldn't help the fit of giggles bubble from my mouth. "I'm so sorry," I laughed.
"That-is real nice Hannah," he stated as a smile crept over him.
"S-sometimes my sneezes are too big for me."
"That sneeze was big enough for five men." I laughed harder into his chest. "And here I am taking the full force of it." He looked at the table behind him in vain as he tried to find a box of tissues. "Ah, can't reach 'em."
"I'll get 'em."
"No, you don't-" I cut him off by sitting up and crawling over him. I grabbed two tissues and resettled myself on his chest.
"Here you are."
"Thanks." I took the other for myself. "Bet you feel better huh?"
"Yes."
"Probably woke the building up."
"Was it that bad?"
"Horrendous," he smiled. I smiled back and nuzzled into him.
He rubbed his hands as a thin sheet of sweat covered them. Everything, everywhere was hot. He couldn't see anything. There was nothing to stand on yet he was walking. And he noticed the farther he walked the harder it was to breathe. He would have turned around but he was looking for something. Someone.
Angus looked through his dark world but couldn't find anything. He saw something glowing out of the corner of his eye, and the closer he got the hotter he became. Hannah suddenly appeared next to him and he grabbed her. He pulled her closer and she latched on to him as well. Then there was a tug. Some sort of pull began to take Hannah away from his arms. But he pulled her back and wouldn't let go.
I woke up to pressure on my back. Angus' arms were tight around me and I was being pulled closer to him. His eyes were closed, but I couldn't really see in my position. I squirmed to loosen his hold a bit and maybe wake him up but he forcefully pulled me back in again. He's stubborn even in his sleep.
Nothing else mattered. Not where he was, not how he got there, nor why he wanted Hannah so bad. Only that she was safe with him. She herself began to pull away from him and struggle in his arms. He rubbed her back to calm her down but she wouldn't give in. And neither would he.
My elbow throbbed as I sat on the floor. Angus' behavior had scared me some and I pulled away as quick as I could before he got me again. Which only ended up with me falling off the couch. I saw Angus sit up and pat around the couch, then look over the side. "My God," he whispered then reached out to help me up. "Are you okay?"
"I think so." Angus turned the lamp off before we went to sleep so it was darker than ever. I stumbled into the couch and bumped my nose on a loose spring. My face grew warm as I was gently but quickly pulled to his chest again.
"I'm sorry, I just-" He sniffed and rubbed his face, still groggy. "Just a bad dream is all." His breathing was uneven and his heart raced.
"You're tellin' me. Tried waking you up but you wouldn't listen."
"Didn't hurt you did I? 'Cause if I did-"
"No, no I'm okay." He sighed.
"I'm sorry," he whispered in my ear. His arms sneaked around my waist and his head rested against mine.
