(Finished) Saying Excuses jacksepticeye x reader. SEQUAL TOO DRESSED IN FEAR

Your Own Hell

Jacks P.O.V.

'Why?' you ask shyly. You are so desperate to know why Felix is this drunk, why he was driving a car and why he hit you. For which reason does your world collapse every once in a while. Just so somebody up above can see how strong you are, can see that you have it in you to be great?

You feel how Felix his muscles tense as you long for the truth, and you know that he might not give it to you. But there is one good thing alcohol brings with: honesty. Felix therefore is bewitched by the sudden urge to tell you the truth. And you are the last person to stop him.

'Marzia and I had a fight,' he whispers, like he doesn't give a damn thing about her. He runs his hand through your greenish hair which is now a bloody mess. He pulls you even tighter against his chest and you feel how fast his breath is going. You are genuinely concerned about your Swedish friend.

Yet what you don't notice when he pulled you further into his hug, is that he made sure that, at any time, your eyes where facing away from the crime scene. He doesn't want you to see how he ruined your life, and how much you have to build up again.

You, of course, didn't notice because this binding moment easily made you forget what had happened. And Felix is set on it to keep it that way. The reason that some memories are slowly fading is because you don't WANT to remember how your whole world, your whole universe came crashing down on you.

You don't care is Felix his hug is legitimate or that he is acting like he cares. Your friend is still miles away from being sober and at this moment, it doesn't bother you that he is.

Any answer you could give on what Felix had just said, would be wrong. How CAN you respond to something like that? So you decide it is best not to. Therefore you keep silent, hoping that Felix is going to change the subject.

But also he is not saying anything anymore. His head is turning and moving as if he is looking at something. As his muscles tightened, you know he is scared if something or someone.

You yell at your brains to start working again, you scream at them to figure out what is making this fearless Swede so afraid. They refuse to waste their time on something like that and choose to focus on your wound which you have almost forgotten about.

Felix inhales quickly, like you do when you see something so scary you just store all the oxygen up in your lungs. You don't understand what is making him fear is surrounding that much. You don't understand what is happening, and you might never have if your friend hadn't reconsidered that it was best to show you your own Hell.

'I'm so sorry,' your mate says as he takes a few steps away from you. The smell of alcohol still floats in the air, and you give up on denying its strong aroma. You breathe the booze in and out, making your head feel lighter and the world less doomed for only a second.

Your famous friend turns your face towards your love. You, at first, think he is just done with hugging and look back at him for some kind of emotional reaction, or some moral support, anything to make you understand what is going on...

Your scream for help is ignored.

Right then and there, on the sticky sidewalks of L.A. your heart breaks into million pieces to small to pick up again and glow together so it will hold for another minute. As the fatal strike is being delivered, you freeze.

Y/N looks even worse than you, blood almost covering every inch of her fragile body. Her side is soaked in the red liquid. Even her face, legs and arms are used like a canvas to paint on.

A quick flutter runs up your spine, fear and sadness take over your emotions and your body is nothing more than a puppet for these feeling to play with. You stare at her tortured body, seeing that her heels still "survived" this horrible accident.

The shoes got lost in the air as metal hit flesh, one of them stayed on its owners foot dangling on her heel while the other drowned in the blood of her lover. It looked like a horror movie that came to live, and for some it actually was.

You are showing all your emotions, not caring what people would think of you. Your lower lip shivers, your eyes cry, your hands turn into fists and your skin becomes paler than the average Irish pale.

Felix knows you for a couple of years now, long enough to suspect that you are going to explode any minute now. For that reason he holds you in his drunken arms, trying to banish all your resistance. The alcohol takes over again and he laughs while protecting the world from this walking time bomb.

'Let me go to her!' you scream but your mate is not going to let you. His grip becomes even tighter and your waist is pushed against his. You yell again, her name, her nickname, even her full name, but she cannot respond to any of it.

Your loud voice comes in handy now, because your high tone has made Felix fall over and hold his hands against his ear. A light zooming continues in his head after your loud scream. Your loud scream you used for Happy Weels, for golf with your friend, for ANY game you got the change of using it.

Now you have come so far, you are not going to give up. You only forgot one tiny (box Tim) fact: Felix was holding you up because your leg is making sure you will not flee from your biggest nightmare.

You try to ignore the burning flame of pain rushing through your veins; your health is the last thing you care about right now.

You try running to her body, knowing your legs will betray you and make you fall to the floor, you grab the first thing you see and hope it will help you get up or stay on two feet. And once you have realised what you are holding on to so clingy, you fall to the floor as predicted.

You try to lift you up on the thing you where holding, and you even succeed by some very alarming words coming from your friend. But you try to get up and deal with it. You have to, because Y/N needs you more than she has ever needed you.

So you tell yourself to keep going, to get up and run towards her because she needs you. You tell yourself the truth: that this moment may be your last with her. You just wish that God isn't that cruel and that he will help her survive.

Whatever you have to do, whatever price you have to pay, you will. You just don't want to lose your girlfriend already. You where meant to be together, so if she...

'NO! SHE ISN'T!' you scream while you fall to the floor once again. 'She can't be...'

Anyone who would not know what happened would think you are in need of mental care RIGHT NOW. But people don't understand. People haven't lost almost everything they hold dearest. They haven't seen their biggest nightmare come to life. They haven't lost anything in this godforsaken place. And the people that HAVE lost something or someone are acting blind. Say that nothing happened. But they can't deny it forever. They can't run for eternity.

And you won't even try.

-------------------------

sorry that this is such a bad chapter and that I haven't updated in a while but with school and all that stuff I'm just I guess you could say stressed. I'm so sorry and I hope to update again this week.

I love you cornflakes so much,

Stay BOSS!!!