Soul Mate (UberHaxorNova)

Chapter 16: The Diary

I have to have this chapter in James' POV this time around. It'll just make it a lot better, but this is probably going to be the only time I do this.

James' POV

I rolled around the bed, desperately trying to shake him from my thoughts. It was my fault. I couldn't even attend his funeral. I just missed him so much. I shouldn't of let it happen. God, how could I have been so fucking stupid.

A sound of a door opening broke the silence.

The male sighed heavily. "James, you can't keep doing this to yourself." He said.

I said nothing; did nothing. Just laid there and listened.

"Listen, I've had something from the funeral. They said to give it to you, but I was going to wait until your better, though it seems your not going to get better any time soon. Maybe this will help."

I turned my head towards the man, seeing what looked like a book being held out in front of me. I took it, hesitantly, and flipped to a random page.

"They said your mentioned a lot in there."

I skimmed through some random lines and I already felt my eyes get glossy.

"He really cared for you, James."

I flipped to the first page, which seemed to  indicate he was starting middle school.

I met these really cool guys...

I flipped a few pages up.

They kept mentioning my timer was going to go off in a few days...

The next few pages i had flipped to choked me up. It had 2 little ripped off pieces of notebook paper. One had a simple statement I didn't understand, while the other had two more statements. I read on in the diary.

I met my soul mate yesterday, and he's absolutely gorgeous. I just don't understand why I'm not his. I came home crying. I explained the story to Mom and Dad, but they just said to keep quiet about it. To stay away from him. I couldn't just stay away from my soul mate, though. So I did quick research and found out some good, and bad news. It's not just a pick and choose kind of deal, you either stay alone for the rest of your life, or just die young. But I did find that you could be best friends with them. And I'm going to make that my goal. Hopefully, by the end of our last year at middle school, me and James will be best friends.

"James, it's okay. It's not your fault."

I slammed the book shut. "It is my fault, Aleks! I fucking lost my best friend! I shouldn't have just let him run away that day! I needed to go after him!" I yelled, falling into Aleks' arms.

He continued to comfort me through out the night, and hummed a small tune in my ear.

It's been like this every night for about a week, now. I'm slowly getting better, but I just wished I had time to say goodbye. The night after he died, I was told by his parents that he was my soul mate, but I wasn't his. I immediately felt horrible. I mean, how fucked up is that? To have someone you care about love you, but you don't love them back?

You can pretty much say I've dropped out of high school. I haven't gone since last week. I've started staying at Aleksandr's house more often, and because of that reason, all the guys know about Aleksandr. I don't know how they took it, because of my lack of attendance and isolating myself. Aleks has helped me a lot. Especially at night. I've had horrible nightmares. Not so much of Seamus, but of my father. Every time, he just stands there, and picks out every wrong I've done, then tells me how ashamed he is of me. I usually wake up in a panic, but Aleks calms me down. He laid with me.

I felt like, even through all we've been through, we're some how still getting closer.

Alright. That'll be the last time I do that point of view thing. Now, if you excuse me, I need to book a flight out of this country and to the moon.