Searching for the Monster's Child :.Book 3 in the Delfunie Trilogy.:

Chapter 2

We've been at my parents' house for two weeks now. I adopted Ragnar's three boys and we are waiting to hear about Emilee's mother to see if I can proceed with her or not. The boys were excited about it and almost instantly started calling me mom. Although Nathan was still a little weird about it. I told him he can call me whatever he's comfortable with.

"Mavis?" I turned from the table where I was folding laundry to see Nathan standing nervously in the doorway. I smiled at him which seemed to help calm him down a little as he passed the threshold of the laundry room. "Can I ask you a question, Mavis?" He asked quietly.

"Sure, Nathan. That's what stepmoms do?" With him being uncomfortable with the whole mom scenario, I still only myself his stepmom.

"I heard dad talking about Uncle Jefferson and Uncle Lucas. Did they really do bad things?" He asked me. I took a deep breath and thought about what to say to him. Did Ragnar want him to know what his brothers did to me? To us? Did I really want him to know about what his father went through? I settle on an easy answer.

"Nathan, your uncles...they did do some pretty bad things, which is what your dad and me are trying to fix. You see..."

"Nathan?" I turned to see Ragnar standing in the doorway. "Nate, you're supposed to be helping your grandmother in the garden. Why don't you run out there bud." He said gently taking his son's shoulder and guiding him out the door. Finally, he turned to me and he looked upset.

"Mavis, why would you even think about talking to my son about my brothers?" He asked, putting his hands in his pocket, a gestor that I'm now learning means he's getting angry.

"Nathan came to me, Ragnar. He heard you talking about what they've done and it upset him. I wasn't going to tell him anything, I was going to give a crappy answer and then come talk to you. That's it/" He seemed even more upset.

"No, I don't want him asking questions about them. I don't want you telling him anything, not even a crappy answer. I don't want him knowing about that aspect of my life.:

"Then don't talk about it with him in the house." I yelled back. He crossed his arms over his chest and took a step closer.

"He wasn't supposed to be in the house, but I guess it's a thing around here, people can't keep an eye on children." I felt my eyes widen and my jaw drop. I could read between the lines. I felt the tears stream down my cheeks and I pulled passed him and went up to my room.

I threw myself on my bed and let the sobs rip from my chest. Now knowing how Ragnar really feels about losing Jax really hurt. He blames me, even after denying that fact so many times, he blames me. I couldn't take that. I needed to find Jax. I needed to find my son.

"Mavis?" I heard from the doorway. I didn't even look up as Ragnar made his way around the bed. "Mavis, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. I was..." I cut him off.

"Ragnar, don't. We promised we wouldn't do that. No 'I was just mad' or 'I didn't mean for it to sound like that.' Just tell me the truth, you actually do blame me for losing Jax." I heard him take a deep breath in, which was answer enough. I just closed my eyes.

"Mavis, I don't blame you. Do I wish you had stayed in the van? Yes, but I don't blame you for losing Jax, Lucian would have ended up with Jax anyway. He would have found some way to manipulate you into giving him the baby. And when you didn't, he would have killed you, Mavis. I couldn't live with that. I have you now and we will get Jax back. I don't know how just yet bit we will get him back." I just rolled over and placed his head in his lap, my brown hair falling in my face until he pulled it back.

"I'm just scared, that's all. It's almost September and we still have no idea where he is. I just can't stop..."

"Hey, listen to me Mavis, you need to stop. You need to keep your mind here. It's the only way to keep your sanity. Just keep your mind on daily things, the kids, the house, anything but Jax. I know that sounds bad but you got to relax. We will get him back, I promise." He said. I rolled to look up at him and I found myself smiling. He leaned down and kissed me. He was right, I just need to think about what we have now. When we have a lead on Jax, then I'll worry about that.