That summer

Chapter 21: sacrifices

Nina's pov

"yeah, I guess we are" Fabian said sadly.

I looked down, lost for the words that I could say. Fabian lifted my chin up.

"Nina, I made a promise to stay with you. I never break promises. I promise I'll stay with you. Even if it means skipping school I will stay."

Before he knew it Fabian was engulfed in another loving hug, greater than the hug the previous day. I nudged my head between his neck and shoulder. Suddenly I felt the urge to start crying. The fact that he would skip school for me is just too much to ask of anyone, especially Fabian with his perfect reputation and everything. It's just too much. I guess I was crying because Fabian kept on patting my back and telling me it was okay, for all I knew, I clearly wasn't. I needed help not comfort, that's what I kept thinking. That was one thought I constantly had to push out of my already full mind.

"C-can we go home" I stuttered out.

Fabian cupped his hand around my face. I tried to smile but the overwhelming pain throughout the week took over my real happiness.

"Yeah, lets go" he said taking my hand and smiling at me.

I loved it when he smiled at me. But now I'm thinking he's only smiling because he's worried or desperate. One or the other. He takes me to the car and drives avoiding any and all potholes he could. Thank god we didn't get in an accident. I mean he wasn't driving terribly but I could tell he was too nervous to even accelerate more than he should. He cares that's all that matters. We arrive back at the house and I just feel like I should go ahead and say it. Fabian takes us to my bedroom and he tucks me in under the covers. I smile at him. A real smile. The radiant beams of light shone in through the blinds causing him to have some sort of a heavenly glow. He sits next to me and strokes my face. His hands were light and gentle, like a kid stoking his first animal and getting it to like the human. Only I'm no animal, I'm like a monster. What am I making this poor boy do?!

Suddenly out of the blue, I blurt it out. "Fabian I need you to do something for me" I say.

Fully listening his eyes widened and his face showed seriousness.

"Yes love?" He asked with compassion.

"Don't stay with me. I need you to go too school and get a diploma and get good grades. I need you to be on your own. " I admitted.

By the look of his face he took this harder than I thought. He grabbed my hands gently in his and looked at me desperately.

"Nina how can I leave you like this. I promised."

"This Is one promise your going to have to break. "

"What about you than?"

I stared at him blankly. I thought of something but it's totally bizarre.

"Amber could come and take care of me. She could say she went to fashion school or something and stay with me. I'll do summer school after the baby is born." I said. I think this'll work.

"I thought you didn't want anyone else to know" he looked at me. Tears are forming in his eyes. Gosh I loathe it when he cries. It makes me wanna cry too.

"She's an exception. She's my best friend. She can keep a secret." I said confidently.

"Nina, I..it's just I wanted to be there for everything. I wanna see it grow inside you and I want to be an active parent. It's not fair that I have to leave this all on you". He shed a tear I tried to hold mine back.

"Look, I know. I can always text you and Skype you."

Fabian seemed to be lost for words.

"What am I supposed to say then. If people ask where you are what can I say?" He asked.

I looked into his eyes and cupped my hand around his pale red puffy eyed face.

"Act like you don't know. Make a scene about it."

That set him off he instantly came down and kissed me multiple times.

"No, I can't do that" he said through tears.

"It's the only way" I admitted.

"No, no, no" he muttered under his breath as he hugged me.

"I'm sorry. It's the only way. Please stop crying" I pleaded.

"I love you Nina" he said refusing to dry his tears.

"I love you too" I said.

He kissed me a few times. The more he kissed me the harder it was to hold onto my tears. They wanted to cascade down my face as if it was a waterfall.

"Fine" he said grudgingly. "I'll do it" he said.