You're Not Alone (Austin Carlile)

15. Middle Fingers Up

•writers block so going to write this chapter and maybe the next ones from now on in different POVS!•
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Title credit: Attila

Keirsten's POV:

(It goes a few days back, just so you don't get confused)

"Bye Austin! Bye Holly!" I call after them as they enter the mad house of an airport. Great, now I'm stuck with Alan. It's not necessarily a bad thing, but I get kind of, weird when I'm around guys I like. Especially after our fail of a date, oh my was that a disaster. I'm really surprised that when we got home he came in my room to comfort me, it was really sweet.

"Keys." I say to Alan, placing my hand out for him to put them in my hand. I just want to get home and lay around, not like I already do that all the time.

"Only for a kiss." He puckers up and I roll my eyes. In return I receive a grin, he casually strolls over to the drivers side and gets in. I groan in defeat and get in the passenger side.

"You better not wreck Holly's car, she will kick your ass."

"I won't, stop being a worry wuss baby. Besides, do you really think I'm scared of a 5'4" girl that's dating my best friend?" He chuckles at what he had just said.

"I'm not your 'baby'." I say bluntly. "Also I would be, that girl has a temper."

"Whatever you say babe." He winks at me. Ugh he aggravates me so much with his cockiness. To stop myself from punching him in the mouth, I mess with the radio as we leave the airport. I stop on Cleveland's classical rock station as Simple Man by Lynyrd Skynyrd plays through the speakers. I instantly calm down and start humming along, feeling peaceful.

"I fucking love Lynyrd Skynyrd!" Alan yells out, startling me just a bit and he turns it up louder, disrupting the peace I once had. Don't get me wrong, I'm highly annoyed with him, but he does have a great taste in music of course.

"Me too." I say quietly and he looks over at me with a grin on his face. I feel my cheeks get hot and I look away. He laughs and looks back at the road, strumming his fingers on the steering wheel along to the guitar part. Not to mention I also get super awkward too. I drop all conversation and quietly sit there, looking out the window as we drive back to the apartment, making sure not to look at him.

"Keirsten?"

"Hm?" I mumble, glancing over at him.

"You're really beautiful." I look away from him with an idiotic smile on my face. 3 simple words can make my smile go from ear-to-ear. I want to believe him, but what the mirror spats at me is what I now believe.

'Ugly.

No one wants you.

You're alone.

You're incapable of being loved.

You disgust me.'

The mirrors toying words play through my mind until I realize that I should answer him.

"That was random." I say, trying my best to battle away the harsh words.

"It was, but I think you should be told all the time because you really are, especially to me." I bite my bottom lip and turn to look at him, his ginger hair looks so vibrant in the light. I wonder if he's reading my mind? No, impossible. He could never grasps this never ending suffrage going on in my mind. His brown eyes meet my gray eyes for a second and I take in every detail that I can. He looks back at the road, I grab his free hand and intertwine our fingers together, he looks over and smirks. When our fingers latched together, all the thoughts just-vanished. poof. Gone. How? How can something as simple as that make the darkness retreat?