carpe diem

on self love and growing up

•
•
•

there will be days where you will not feel like yourself,
and there will be days where that is all you want.
there will be days where you can't feel at all,
and there will be days where you have to.

you will see her and wish to be her,
you will see yourself and wish to be someone else, anyone else.
you will see him and wish to love him,
you will see yourself and be unable to love what you see.

you will see everyone as beautiful,
and your eyes will shine like Starry Night,
and your mind will be filled with thoughts of flowers and the sky at 5am.
you will see yourself as nothing,
and your eyes will fill with tears for no reason,
and every reason all at once.

they will ask you why you are sad,
and you will have no answer.
they will ask you why you are happy,
and you will have too many answers, but you will be too scared to share them.

they will ask you who you love,
why you love,
how you love,
and you will stutter because you are as indecisive as the winter this year,
and a little girl choosing her new puppy.

they will tell you that you cannot be yourself,
and that you have to.
they will break you,
and you will stumble.

they will tell you that you are enough,
and you will struggle to believe them.
they will see you fall,
and they will point and laugh,
like the boys and girls in school.

you will be silent,
and they will tell you to speak up.
you will speak up,
and they will tell you that what you have to say is wrong,
and unimportant.

you will feel that way too.
it will hurt.
you will cry.
you will feel the crushing weight of your insecurities,
but someone will be there to take it away.

you may not find your Prince Charming,
or be the perfect woman.
the man of your dreams may not be waiting,
and you may not be exactly who you expect,
but you will not need to be.

once you learn to love yourself,
you will not need to think about these things,
you will not worry,
or be frightened,
or be wary,
because you will be yourself,
And you are stronger than anyone who stands against you, because you believe that to be true.

- ch