Whilst the boyfriends away

74.

Even after chat with the doctor to discuss my pregnancy and not the miscarriage, I'm still at a lost for words. It's a lot to take in and its going to take me awhile.

"Stay here, I'll get the car," Aston said as we reached the bench at the main entrance.

"No, I can walk," I replied.

He attempt to argue with me, instead he took my hand and lead me across the pedestrian crossing. I'm so relived to be able to leave hospital the same day I arrived, although it is four o'clock now and Aston's family will be home within the hour.

"Do you want to stop for something to eat?" Aston asked slowly pulling out of the car park.

"I don't mind, if you like," I shrugged.

"You must be hungry and you have to eat, you're feeding two now."

"That's just an old wives tale, Aston," I said staring out of the window.

Driving back to his parents house, I can't consider it as home, he took the first left instead of continuing right like we usually would. I looked around and realised he's brought us to McDonald's.

"Hello, can I take your order please?" a female voice asked over the speaker in the drive through.

"Hiya. Can I have two cheeseburgers and chips please?"

"Is that as a meal?"

"Yes please."

"What drinks would you like?"

"Diet cokes."

"So that's cheeseburger and chips with a diet cole twice?"

"That's right."

"Okay, if you could drive to window two and collect your order please."

"Thanks a lot," he replied easing around the corner.

I took the bag and cups of drink whilst Aston paid the bill sitting them on my lap, the smell has automatically brought my appetite back.

"I'll park up so we can eat them before they get cold," he said scanning the car park for a space.

"Thank you," I replied.

"It's no problem," he chuckled quietly to himself.

I took our food out of the bag and passed the wrapped up cheeseburger over to Aston with his fries. Piercing the cups with the straws provided I put them into the two cup holders under the radio system. McDonald's has always been a firm favourite of mine and right now I couldn't give a shit about my weight.

"Hey, that was probably mine!" Aston teased as I ate the chips left in the bottom of our bag.

"Maybe, but there's a fifty percent chance it was mine."

He watched as my giggle faded into a frown. I can think of another thing with a fifty-fifty chance.

"Come here, give me a kiss," he whispered leaning towards me. I pressed my lips firmly back to his.

"What was that for?" I asked.

"I miss you," he shrugged.

"Sorry."

He's right, I haven't been myself lately. I can't remember the last time we kissed, properly. The passion that has always been between us and in our relationship has disappeared, it's muted. Obviously there are reasons why we haven't had sex and I'm sure Aston understands that, but I haven't even attempted to be passionate again. I feel terrible now I come to think of it, Aston's been my rock these last couple of weeks. I thank him no end but sometimes words aren't enough are they?