Fading Out (COMPLETED)

Chapter nineteen

I wake to the sound of urgent and quiet knocking on my door. I know it's her before I open it, I can feel her.
"Izzy what's wrong?" I ask as I look at her teary eyes.
"You" she sobs entering my room without permission.
"What's wrong with me now? Why am I never good enough for you?" I ask with a frown, that's not what I say.
"You're not him, it's always going to be him" she tells me as her arms wrap around my neck anyway.
"I know, why are you here?" I whisper wrapping my arms around her little waist.
"Because I love you" her lips brush mine as she tells me as smooth as the silk of her nightgown.
"I hate you" I reply and kiss her deep and needy.
I lift her nightgown and her legs wrap around my waist, fuck, no panties. I rub the hardness of me into the softness of her and her moan makes my knees shake.
"I want you Cole"
"I need you, I've always needed you" I groan and her little fingers undo my jeans.
Her warm hand squeezes my length and I growl into her mouth kissing her with more urgency.
"Will you love me forever?" She breathes as she lowers herself down onto me.
"Yes, oh fuck yes" I cry out at the feeling.
"Tell me" her eyes beg me and her heart beats against mine.
"I can't do that baby, you're married remember?" I moan.
"Make love to me Bug" Iz rolls her hips and I hold her close.
"It's just fucking, nothing else" I tell her and I lay her on my bed to move over her, in her.
There's a bang on my door and I jump, oh no he's angry again.
"Shh he'll know your here" I cover my hand over Izzy's mouth to stop her moans.
"Of course I know" a deep and furious voice comes through the door.
I look back at Iz and her face is slack, her eyes rolled back and white foam covers my fingers. I let out a cry of despair and lift her up to shake her back to life, I clutch at her wide shoulders for dear life.
"No, please no!" I shout and my eyes snap open.
Jace stares back wide eyed and confused, I let him go and scramble back against the headboard. The shock of her dead body never gets easier.
"Dude?!" He frowns looking over me.
"Fuck" I groan and cover my face. "What are you doing here?"
"Are you okay? No it can wait, where is she?" Jace stands and bangs open the bathroom door.
"With Cooper, she didn't come home" I say trying to catch my breath.
"Not Izzy, where's my sister?!" He demands.
"Lil? Like I would fucking know" I try to get my mind back into reality.
"Don't play with me, I know Jessica's car. She spent the night with you" he spits at me.
"Oh Jess, she's in the guest room"
"Downstairs? You didn't sleep with her?" He asks surprised.
"Why would I sleep with her?" I grumble rubbing my head and climb stumbling from the bed.
"Bro? You okay?" Jace comes back and holds me by the shoulders.
"Why wouldn't I be?"
"You're crying" he tells me gently.
"No I'm not" I say and my voice cracks on a sob.
"Okay man, and I'm not hugging you" he snorts and pulls my head onto his shoulder as his arms wrap around me. "Bad dream?"
"I don't know, I don't know what's wrong with me. I don't cry, not anymore, I'm broken" I sniffle and take a large breath.
"That's it Cole, everything is fine" he soothes me.
"This never happened, Jacinta. Got it?" I grumble pushing off him embarrassed.
"What? Oh fucking hell Jessica" he blushes recognising his ballerina name.
"What are you doing here man?" I ask again regaining my senses.
"I saw Jess's car, I assumed the worst. I get halfway up the stairs and it sounds like a fucking porno in here, it didn't occur to me you were having a nightmare. It sounded like a fucking awesome dream actually" Jace shrugs and looks around my room.
"She fell asleep while feeding Jax, it was too cold out to wake her up. Brent said it's cool if I put her to bed" I yawn.
"What? You spoke to Brent? He knew you two went out?" Jace asks surprised.
"Like I said, it wasn't a date. C'mon, coffee" I grumble and nod to the door.

I follow Jace down the stairs and put the coffee on before going to check on Jax, Jace follows me in.
Jaxon is awake but quiet, playing with Jess's hair. He squeals and laughs to be caught out.
"Shh, you'll wake your mama. C'mere little buddy" I whisper and he holds his arms out to me.
"Dad dad dad dad" he mumbles making my chest tighten.
"Soon little dude, a few more weeks" I kiss his chubby cheek and he kisses me back, open mouthed and all over my face.
"Brent?" Jess moans lifting her head, her hair covers her face thanks to the hair styling of Jaxon.
She makes her way out eventually and blushes when she realises all three of us are looking at her.
"Morning" I smile.
"Cole? Oh god! Is this your room?" Jess panics.
"No, it's our guest room. Sleep well?"
"Fuck, oh god I'm going to be in trouble. Where's my phone?" She bolts up in the bed.
"Relax no one is in trouble, mornings not your thing honey?" I tease.
Jess looks down at herself and smooths out her hair.
"Hey, did you change Jaxon? I can't remember falling asleep" she cocks her head to the side looking over her son in my arms.
"That's because you passed out on the sofa. I changed him, dressed him and put him to sleep. He slept here with you don't worry" I shrug like I'm not awesome.
"So your date went well?" Jace raises his brows at his sister.
"Sure did, the best part was when he blew in my mouth. I've got pics, wanna see?" Jess lifts her chin at him while I cough and splutter for breath.
"I didn't, she doesn't" I step back when Jace's face turns red.
"Ah Cole? The last thing I remember was feeding Monkey, did you?" Jess asks looking down at herself in her dress.
"Well you weren't going to" I blush and Jace punches my arm. "Dude! I'm holding a baby" I say in disbelief.
"Alright boys out! I need the bathroom, Jace please be a good big brother and steal me some of your wife's clothes. Hot ones too, not big fat mama clothes" Jess shoos us back with her hands and her feet land on the pillows on the floor.
She looks up at me questioning then smiles when she figures out why they're there.
"This way" I nod to the door after Jess kisses her sons face good morning.
I gesture to the bathroom as Jace and I head back to the kitchen.