I came early and took my usual seat as always ... which is at the back..
Then students came to class and some were talking about me in disgust ...while I just ignored them reading my book ...
Then teacher came to class and started to teach .... boring as always ... the only subject I like is English ... well that's the subject I only understand....
While the teacher was teaching ...I heard some laughs coming from outside .... well oddly familiar .. who am I kidding , of course it's justin...
He brust through the doors high fiving Ryan.....
Then miss stone looked at them angrily ..
" care to explain why your late to class Mr Bieber .." miss stine asked as he smirks and Ryan laughs ..
" well should I really explain ... I mean its not good for old people like you to hear .." Justin says winking at the sluts......
Ohhh I get it ewwww..
Miss stone looks at Justin with disgust .. " okay I don't wanna hear ... go sit next to ...." miss stone looks at me ... well I am the only girl who sits alone..
" yeah go sit with miss gomez "she says and Justin looks at me in disgust ...
" seriously miss stone ... I would never sit with that freak .." Justin says looking at me giving me a glare ..
Others laugh..
I look down " Mr bieber ..if you don't sit next to miss gomez then you have detention .." she says ..
" ughhh fine .... I will go sit next to that mute " justin says while others start to say ewww at me.
Gosh when do people understand a mute is not a spread able things nor a disease..
Justin made sure to kick my leg before sitting and sat abot far from me ...ugh that hurt..
" okay class ... today I am gonna give you some worksheets ... do it now because you have marks on this .." miss stone says giving the paper's to everyone ...
I got my paper and Justin kicked my leg again ... I looked at him ....
" show me the answers and make sure its right .. If its wrong more pushinshment..."
I nodded scared...
And then I started to the questions .... It was actually easy and I start to write down the answers while justin kept on disturbing me and copying the answers down ... Ohh God I hope these answers are correct ..
After writing ... as usual he starts to tease me and telling me to die ... I just ignore him ..
Then he grabs my arm tight making me gasp in pain..
" bitch you get wat I said .... go die .." Justin says ... I am seriously tired of hearing this and yeah like promised after my work ..I will cut myself ..
I nodded not knowing what to do .. I mean I can't speak ..
Then he lets go of my arms slowly making me frown..
Then I put on a straight face ... I like it when he grabs my arm ...but not that tight ..
I could feel him looking at me ... but I just looked down at my paper doodling ..
After school
" selena go take the trash from the customers who left ." My manger says ... I nod and went to take the trash ... I came back and threw it away...
Then I washed my hands and my manager says I can have food now ... I work 3 hours on Friday ... yeah I only have work at Friday .... and yeah I only eat on Fridays ... but I don't eat completely ... I keep left overs with me for other days...this is how I live.. but today chaz gave me food ..so I won't eat that much .....
Well tomorrow I have to go home ... I am actually scared ..I mean I havnt seen my dad like in a week...
I ate a bit and kept the rest in my bag ...
My manger gave the money for working 3 hrs..... well I got 80$..
Well it's enough for me ...
I showed my sign for thanks and got out ...
And I start walking towards my tree house ... I was scared if justin jumps out of nowhere and scares me ... thankgod he didn't ...I finally made it to my trees house ...
I slowly climbed up ... my body still hurts from the pain..
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I got inside and saw my blanket ... I smiled weakly and I slowly walked towards it and placed my bag in the side and took my book out and wrote my daily life enteries....
I finished and sighed thinking about the words justin said to me ...
I looked over and saw my knife which I took to cut a mango ... from the tree ...
I took it and slowly looked at the sharpness ... I never actually self harmed .. I am doing this because justin said to me ..
I was scared but I took a deep breath and slowly made a slight cut ... ouuuccchhh it hurts but I feel some pleasure ..
The pain feels good actually and I cut again .. this time aliitle bit deeper .. but not hitting the Viens ..
I took a deep breath and looked at my own blood flowing ...
I had tears in my eyes ... I let them flow down my cheeks ..
Why God ... why did I deserve to get this life ...
Then I slowly lay down and drift to sleep ... with my hands still flowing with blood ...
