Cashed » Lip Gallagher [2]

»part 4 » open noses

"Cold sweat, goosebumps. My insomnia has come out to play..." - Jonny Craig - Rhythm in My Soul

Our nine year friendship disappeared with the snap of a finger. The boy who provided clarity for my life hated me and it was all my fault. The shoulder I leaned on for over nine years was nothing more than a memory now.

After Ian greeted me the only way he could, he fell back asleep on Mickey's bed. Mickey told me that he hasn't been the same since he got back. After he got kicked out of the army he bummed around for a while before landing a job at a gay nightclub. He wasn't just pouring drinks for men, he was dancing for them as well. Ian was a stripper with boy shorts and flaming red hair. The boy who often used his brain for me was a walking disaster of his own making. This wasn't like him. I found myself missing him even though he was sleeping on Mickey's bed.

My heart hurt too much to stay in that room without being able to talk to him like we used to so I left with scattered brains and shaking hands.

The Chicago air was crisp while a blanket of ice and snow covered the streets. I held onto my coat tight around my body as I made my way through street after street, thinking about everything I left behind. So much happened while I was away. I knew about Mickey's marriage. I knew about Ian's breakdown at his wedding. I knew about everything yet I stayed away. The boy was my best friend since I was 10 and I left him behind in a time of need. I should have been there for him but I wasn't. That's something I'll beat myself up for every day.

I continued to think endlessly until I reached our floor of the hotel. My day was Gallagher spent and all I wanted was to sleep by myself for a night. I stopped as I saw the door at the end of the hall propped open, smoke was seeping through the crack and music was vibrating through the walls. I could hear laughter and conversation as I got closer. The smell of marijuana flooded my nose when I opened the door. I knew then that I was stepping into hell.

People were scattered all along Renee's suite. There were guys huddled in the kitchen giving girls shotguns, there were girls running around with their tops off, there were old men watching girls dance in the living room. It was like our own strip club. Our once quiet suite was now a nightclub with terrible music and messy people.

I placed my hand on my forehead as a feeling of anxiety began to take over. Every nerve in my body became awake in this moment. I needed to find Renee. My feet wondered through seas of people until they stopped when my eyes saw the brunette bent over on the table with a dollar bill at the end of her nostril while her finger covered the other. With a quick snort, she shot up and began rubbing at her nose with her eyes closed tight. Guys beside her cheered her on while one wrapped his arms around her from behind.

"Cassandra!" She squealed with bloodshot eyes that met mine, "I've been waiting for you! Come here, I have a few friends that want to meet you." A devious smile formed on her pink lips as the guys around her smiled like the devil's play things.