Cashed » Lip Gallagher [2]

»part 26 » cash in wonderland

"I wish I could learn to hate you..."

-

My mind was an endless abyss filled with relapse thoughts and heartache.

The second I got back to Lip's room, I couldn't close my eyes without thinking a single thought of him. Being swaddled in his thin sheets made me think of his arms wrapped around my body. Laying my aching head on his lumpy pillow made me think of my head on his warm chest. I closed my eyes and all I could focus on was the smell of his musk flooding my senses. And when my eyes were open, all I could see was his life. His clothes, his books, his lighters. It was all him.

And where was he? With another girl.

I reached under my pillow, grabbing my phone to check the time. It was 4 o'clock in the morning and I was getting no rest. Every second I closed my eyes, I was bombarded with images of Lip with a faceless woman. And when I wasn't thinking of Lip, tempting thoughts laced my sanity with little white lines on a bathroom sink.

After battling my conscious for a few minutes, I decided to take the executive decision to grab my things and leave. I needed space that didn't include taunting thoughts of Lip and drugs.

I helped Lip make a decent amount of money tonight which meant my job here was done. It was time for me to head home and return to normalcy.

Before leaving, I decided to let Kev know. As I pulled on my hood from my jacket, I wrapped on the hardwood door and waited for an answer. I knew he was probably sleeping but I had to at least let someone know I was leaving. He wouldn't answer his phone every time I tried calling, so this was the only hope.

Without an answer, I continued knocking. "Kevin!" I shouted, hoping that I could wake him from his slumber. I stood calmly before I heard shuffling on the other end.

After a few moments, the door cracked open and Kev slipped out in a swift motion. The sleep in his eyes were evident with heavy bags and the color red. He stood in front of me shirtless, in his boxers, with his arms crossed and an irritated look on his face.

"Do you know what time it is, Cash?" He said in a froggy voice.

I stifled a yawn and nodded, "I'm well aware."

Kev rubbed his eyes, "What's up?"

"I can't sleep so I'm just gonna head home."

"You're leaving?" He said.

I nodded, "My job here is done. I figured I'd see if Vee needed any help at the bar and with the kids."

At the mention of her name, Kev's jaw tightened and he stiffened. I watched as something flashed in his eyes as he looked down at the ground. With all my selfish thoughts, I almost forgot Kev was still killing himself of Vee.