Cashed » Lip Gallagher [2]

»laced

"Let go of everything, then you have bliss..."

-

Everyone has to fight their own demons sooner or later.

When my problems feel like a heavy fog, clouding my vision, I forget that I'm not the only person in the world crumbling. Others have struggles and battles of their own, just like me.

Often times, I picture myself standing still, my feet glued to the ground. I can't move, I can't run, all I can feel is my addict lacing herself into my veins and digging herself deeper. When I look around, all I can see is everyone moving fast while I stand still.

But inside everyone, there are demons. Some are winning against their demons, and others lose to the deadly game. Some just simply co-exist with those monsters, trying to find balance between the good and evil.

All battles are lethal.

But all demons are different. Small or large, these demons come in different forms – forms that terrify your thoughts.

My demon is an addict.

Her stringy hair, her toothy grin. She sits in the darkest corner of my mind, plotting her scheme. She screams, she laughs, she cries.

She feels as every bit of human as I am.

But where there are demons, there are no souls.

And without a soul, demons are weak – even the strongest of them all.

Sooner or later we have to face our demons. We have to go toe-to-toe with the ones that block us from ourselves. And when that war comes, only the truest will flourish from the ashes.

My thoughts drifted as I stood in the quiet bathroom with the small baggie between my fingers. I held the small thing close to my eye level and watched as pieces of the light shined off tiny specks of white dust.

The little grains were beautiful as they were destructive.

This small baggie held a power over me that crushed me from the inside out. It chained my heart into its grip and refused to let me fight. Over a year ago, I would have done anything to get this kind of love rushing through my veins.

The love that would always be synthetic.

But now, as I stare at it in the Gallagher bathroom, all I feel is pity.

Pity for the hallow substance.

My fingers opened the seal to the baggie as I took a deep breath in.

I breathed it all in. My past, my present, my future. My dead father, Tony, Renee, Julian. I breathed in all their memories.

And once I exhaled, I tipped the bag over and watched as the dust sprinkled into the toilet. With the simple and symbolic notion, I could hear a blood curdling cry in the back of my head.

She's dying.

I've broken her heart.

But me? I have no tears, no heartache. There's no withdrawal dripping inside me.

I'm flourishing.

I smiled as I flushed the toilet and watched the laced water dance in a circle before it disappeared down the drain.

And for once in my chaotic life, I finally felt it. Freedom.

Everyone has their own demons.

I had my own.

And, now, I'm burring her six-feet under.

To be continued...

-

Go check out the third book of Cash's series, 'Laced'. It's posted on my profile, so remember to follow me and add it to your library/reading list's. I will be updating the first chapter soon!

This book was a hard one to write and it was a long journey! Thank you so much to all my old supporters and my new! I love all of you for your reads, votes, and comments. Without you, I couldn't continue!

Cash is my life and book three is going to be different but crazy none the less!

(Please note that I will be making chapter edits for this book, so I apologize in advance for all the notifications of updates).

Thank you!

xo

***song lyric: g-eazy ft. devon baldwin - let's get lost