A Candle in the Darkness (A Dragon Age: Inquisition fanfiction)

Billing and Cooing

27 Haring, 9:41

"You are aware that you've ruined our general, aren't you?"

Antonia choked on a swallow of ale, looking wide-eyed at Varric over the rim of her cup. "I'm sorry, would you like to explain that to me?"

"He means, my dear girl, that our commander has been reduced to following you about like a lovesick cow."

"Not a cow, Dorian," rumbled the Iron Bull. "Cows are too gentle and passive. There's real hunger in the way he looks at her. More like a lovesick wolf."

"Maker. What did I do to deserve the three of you?" Antonia asked faintly.

"I think you got incredibly lucky." Varric beamed at her. He laid his cards down. "And that's the game."

"It is not!" She looked at her hand. "Fine, it is, too. You cheat."

"Thank you. I'm glad you've noticed." Varric shuffled the cards, dealing in Dorian and the Bull this time.

"So how was Ferelden, Antonia dear?" Dorian asked, moving his cards around. He looked up, catching the Iron Bull's eyes on him. "What? Fine, I will arrange them again a different way. Now do you know what I have?"

"I knew what you had when Varric dealt it to you—you have crap." The Iron Bull grinned. "Varric's predictable."

"I'll show you predictable," muttered Varric.

"Please, not the Magician again. Show some originality."

Varric glared at the Qunari, stuffing the Magician back up his sleeve. "Someday I'm going to figure out how you do that."

"Good luck, shorty."

Antonia tried to play silently, hoping if she kept quiet long enough they would all go off on a tangent and forget that Dorian had asked about Ferelden. Then she looked up and saw the mage's eyes still on her, waiting, and she groaned.

Dorian chuckled at her discomfort. "Ferelden, my dear?"

"It was very nice."

"Come on, Dorian, you know nothing happened."

"I know nothing of the sort."

"No, Tiny's right," Varric said. "Because if something had happened, we would still be at Skyhold instead of blistering our chests in this Maker-forsaken desert."

"If you would wear actual armor," Antonia snapped.

"The rest of us wouldn't have to spend so much time keeping Dorian from setting you on fire." The Iron Bull smirked at both mage and dwarf.

"Can I help it if I want to see if he explodes like a firecracker?"

"I hate you all," Varric muttered.

"All this isn't getting us any more detail from the boss, either," the Iron Bull pointed out, shifting cards around. Antonia was fairly sure he had one more card than he should, but it really wasn't worth pointing out. "Spill, boss."

"Why don't the three of you go out and find your own ... entertainment, and leave me in peace?"

"Don't look at me," Varric said. "Bianca's enough for me."

Dorian made a show of looking at his cards, and the Iron Bull furtively glanced at the mage and then away. Antonia made a mental note to get Varric alone at some point and see if he knew what was up with those two.

"You know, actually, there's a lot of that going around these days." Varric placed the winning card with a triumphant crow and raked in the pot.