Catboy

09

One week later.
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Lloyd was sprawled over the couch when Julian got home.

He shut the door gently, wincing at its metallic screech. He had been meaning to oil it, but there was never enough time. He made his way through the living room, treading as silently as possible. He passed by the couch, paused to check if Lloyd was asleep or not.

He wasn't. His one eye opened lazily, stared up at Julian. His hand reached out, caught Julian's.

Julian felt his breath catch in his throat. He could feel the solid weight of Lloyd's hand in his. The room, all of a sudden, seemed far too small. "Uh, hey," he muttered, trying to look away, trying to break the spell. It was no use. He couldn't seem to tear his eyes away from the boy in front of him.

"What're you doing home so late?" Lloyd asked, uncurling. He didn't bother to move his hand.

"It's 2 p.m.," Julian replied. "I don't think that exactly counts as late."

"It's late for you," Lloyd grinned. "Given that you never leave the house anyway."

"Shut up," Julian laughed, and Lloyd's hand slipped out of his. He felt the loss almost immediately, with a sharp intake of breath. The spell was broken. Julian looked away. "Why're you asleep this early?"

No response. Lloyd's face fell, his mouth collapsing into a frown. Julian realised, with a start, that his eyes- or, at least, his functioning one- were red and puffy. It was as if he'd been crying.

"Lloyd?" Julian nudged his shoulder with one hand. "You okay?"

"Uh... yeah. Yeah. I'm fine." The words weren't exactly convincing, and Julian raised one eyebrow. "Just, uhhh..." Lloyd blinked once, twice. "You- you know what? Just... Just forget it. It's nothing."

"Move over."

Lloyd looked up at him. "What?"

"Move over," Julian told him. "Let me sit next to you."

Despite his grumbling, Lloyd shuffled over slightly. "I'm not in the mood-"

"Neither am I," Julian said, settling himself down on the couch. "But something's wrong, and you're gonna tell me what that something is."

"Two things," Lloyd blurted, and Julian looked over in surprise. "I, uh... Two things. Three. Maybe... maybe four." He shook his head. "Do we need to do this right now?"

"Yes," Julian insisted. "We do."

And, once again, Lloyd's hand sought his. Julian tried not to recoil at the sudden contact. They sat on the couch in silence, holding hands. Julian listened as Lloyd struggled with whatever he was trying to say.

It took a moment, but he eventually managed to form a few sentences.

The sentences that would break Julian down for weeks to come.

"I, uh, I have to move."

Julian's eyes widened. His free hand curled into a fist, even without him realising it. "Wait, wait. What?"

"You heard right." Lloyd tried to laugh, but it was a weak attempt, and it fell flat within the apartment walls. "I, uh... there's more." He noticed Julian's pained expression, gave a sad little smile. "Are you still sure we have to do this now?"

Julian didn't reply, only motioned for him to continue. Lloyd took a deep breath.

"I went to the doctor today."

Julian flinched instinctively. Years of conditioning by his mother had led him to an extreme phobia of doctors. They'll send you to the scientists. They'll experiment on you, and torture you. They'll kill you.

And that will be the end of that.

"They said that I'm getting worse."

"Worse?"

"Uh, you know how my balance hasn't been good? Well, even worse?" Lloyd sighed. "As it turns out, the tree wasn't exactly sterile."

"Obviously not."

"That's not the point, Julian."

"Sorry."

Another pause, another shaking breath. "The tree was carrying some kind of virus. My brain... there's an infection."

Julian glanced up at him, his mind reeling. What? No. That's not right. That can't be right.

"It's called, uh... toxi... toxoplasmosis. It's basically an infection. But uh... it usually doesn't show up in people. Well, teenagers. It's usually babies. But it builds up this kind of tissue in your brain, except that tissue's really fucked up, I guess." Lloyd laughed shakily. "And, um... god, I'm sorry," he muttered, letting go of Julian's hand and rubbing at his eye. "I'm just... I'm sorry."

Julian tried not to let himself get discouraged. "Well, hey. At least they caught it early, right?" He tried to reach an arm over Lloyd's shoulder, but was abruptly shoved away.

Lloyd sniffed, tried to blink away tears. "Usually, it's fine."

"Usually?"

"But my immune system's weak already. So... If I get sick ever again, if I get even the slightest infection while this one is still in my brain..."A pause.

"Then?"

"I've got a seventy percent chance of dying."

And the world shattered.

"What the fuck?" Julian heard himself say. "What the fuck?"

"So yeah, I have to move. To the hospital." Lloyd gave a bitter laugh, tears spilling down his face. "I'm not coming back anytime soon."

"What the fuck?" Julian repeated. His whole world was numb, confused.

"I'm sorry," Lloyd said, and got to his feet, a little unsteady. Julian stared blankly at him, as if he couldn't really see.

Lloyd turned to go, but Julian reached out and grabbed his arm.

"Wait."

"What?" Lloyd's face felt hot. Calm down. He's just grabbing your arm. Relax.

You care about his brother, remember?

But, of course, he knew it was a lie.

"The other two things."

"What?"

"You said there were two other things. You said that there were two other problems. What were the other two?"

Arin said he's found a girlfriend. I'm happy about that.

You haven't found a girlfriend yet. But I'd be happy to play the role.

Maybe I like you more than I realised, Julian.

Maybe that's why I kissed you.

Maybe that's why I want to kiss you now.

Lloyd shook his head, shrugged out of Julian's grip. "It doesn't matter," he said. "I think I've said enough for today."

"Lloyd-"

"It doesn't matter," Lloyd spat, and Julian flinched slightly. "I'm going to bed. I'm tired."

"It's 2 p.m.," Julian muttered.

"Yeah. 2 p.m. is late for someone who only has so many hours left to live."

And, with that, Lloyd left, and brought a piece of Julian's heart with him.

And that was all that was said for the next few days.