The Ern Chronicles II

(13) Prank'd

Hey guys. So it's me, Zern. Been a long time since we last updated this, hasn't it? Well, a lot of shit has gone down in our lives since last time and I guess we just forgot about this little gem.

Since we last updated this, we've gone to separate schools and we've learnt new life lessons and, well... we've grown up a little more. It's been a bittersweet journey. But we're still tight.

ANYWAYS! ENOUGH OF THAT! Lemme tell you a story. Hope it makes you laugh so hard you pee yourself.

Much loves! Don't forget to vote and comment for this if you liked it! ♥

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"You know," I say, sloppily munching on my cheeseballs, "I'm an awesome prankster."

Mandy looks up from her food in surprise and says, "What kind of a random conversation are we about to start now?" And then immediately she wrinkles her nose in disgust. "Ew, don't talk with food in your mouth, you gross pig."

I close my mouth. And then open them again, still chewing. "No, but really. I am. I'm the bestest prankster out there. I annoy you to death everyday with my pranks."

"Bestest isn't a word. Now stop talking and eat quietly."

It had been almost one year since my squad in junior high school had gone into seperate high schools. We were still close, but I had found a new friends at my new school too.

And also, since junior high, I've gotten even more crazier.

I swallow down my cheeseballs and wipe my hands on a tissue. "Dude. Name one time you played a good prank on me and I won't annoy you the whole of today."

"Only for today?"

"Hey, atleast I am offering you one day off. Be thankful."

There is a second of contemplating silence before she replies in that wry voice of hers. "Well then, remember the time you were sleeping in class and I woke you up by pouring an entire water bottle on you? Or the time you were sleeping in class, again, and when you woke up I'd plastered staples all over your clothes and hair? Or the time you fell asleep in class, again, so I --"

"Okay okay! But I was sleeping all those times. It ain't fair at all." I grin. "Tell you what. Bet you 20 bucks that you can't play an awesome prank on me. In school. Within this week."

"I'm not playing your stupid games."

"C'mon! It's only Tuesday so there's a lot of time for you to prank me properly. I dare you."

"Ruby..."

"Double dare you."

"How you even my friend?"

"Why, you too chicken to even give it a shot?"

She sighs the biggest sigh anyone can sigh.

"That a yes?"

She ignores my question.

:::

Friday comes around quick.

"So around two days back, I made a bet with Mandy," I explain. "She owes me 20 bucks if she can't play a prank on me by the end of today."

Zoe looks amused. "So basically you're asking to be annoyed."

I shrug. "Basically. But hey. It's not like Mandy can play a decent prank anyway so it's a 20-buck gain for me."

"You know you could've made that money another way, right."

I shrug again. "Eh I don't know, maybe I could've. It doesn't matter now. I'm owning her money."

Man, I wish I noticed her stupid holier-than-thou smirk then.

:::

"You walking home today?" I ask Mandy later, when school was wrapped for the day.

"Yeah."

"Oh. I'll walk with you. My house is on the way to your house."

"Okay."

"Dude, wait. I gotta pee. Be right back."

Mandy grins for some damn reason. "Ofcourse. You pee everyday after school. You're so predictable I swear to god."

"Shut up. A girl needs to pee sometimes."

"Haha, a girl is no one. Cmon, I'll wait for you outside the bathroom stalls."

:::

Okay, bathrooms are sacred places where you can do private stuff. Bathrooms are made for privacy. You absolutely DO NOT break the sacred privacy rule. It's like, the number one rule of private bathrooms. Privacy.

And honestly, I think that's why I was so taken aback when Mandy decided to pull her prank in a school bathroom of all places.

The moment I settled on the toilet, she switched off all the bathroom lights. There's no window for sunlight to come in so I was in complete darkness.

And let me tell you... a girl hates peeing in the dark.

"MANDY YOU FUCKING ASSWIPE SWITCH ON THE FUCKING LIGHTS YOU PIECE OF SHIT!!!!"

(I will be proud of how loud my voice was till the end of time.)

I could hear laughing outside. That was Mandy's voice right there, and... was that Zoe's voice? And Rita's?

Mandy brought along my other buds to see me lose my dignity.

Fuck.

"YOU LITTLE SHITS SWITCH ON THE MOTHERFUCKING LIGHTS OR I WILL FUCKING CUT YOU!!!!"

The lights came back on.

"THANK YOU."

But apparently, thet weren't done pranking me.

Because after a while, I saw Zoe's phone pushed into my bathroom stall through the gap under the door. It had it's camera turned towards me, like it was videoing me peeing.

Yeah, remember the number one rule of bathrooms? Privacy.

I was too shook to shove the phone away and I was too shook to quickly cover myself. I was too shook, in fact, to do anything other than lose my dignity even more.

"GET YOUR FUCKING PHONE AWAY FROM ME YOU FUGLY ASS FARTS OR I WILL KILL YOU RIGHT THIS INSTANT!"

There was silence, and then Zoe's voice saying, "You fugly ass farts?"

And then they started giggling again.

"I MEAN IT YOU STUPID ASSES! GIVE ME SOME GODDAMN PRIVACY!!!"

My brain finally decided to stop being shook so I shoved the phone away from me. Zoe picked up her phone and proceeded to run away from the bathroom with everyone, and their laughter never ceased.

Dumbfucks.

Once I'd done my business in the bathroom, I called Zoe to yell at her, and got greeted by her voicemail.

Fuming like a freight train, I stomped out of the bathroom and shoved my earphones into my ears. Turned up Ed Sheeran to full volume. Started singing along to Shape Of You to forget how angry I was feeling.

And that was when I recieved a text from Zoe. I really wasn't in the mood to talk to her, but I ended up opening her text anyway. It said:

"Hey man, sorrynotsorry about that prank. You were the one who bet Mandy to play a prank on you, remember? Soz, but I just had do that because girl. You go around pranking everyone so you totally deserved to be prank'd this once. xD
Oh and Ruby. I owe you 50 bucks if you can play a prank on me next week. ;)) goodluck bitch, I hope you fail at this.
You owe Mandy 20 bucks now btw. Xxx"

Needless to say, I didn't talk to my so-called friends for the next two days and also ended up failing Zoe's challenge.

:::

P.S. IT'S HILDA'S 18TH BIRTHDAY TODAY Y'ALL! THIS GULL FINALLY TURNED LEGAL AND CAN VOTE AND DRIVE MOTORBIKES AND STUFF! OHMYGOD WE GROW UP SO FAST. DON'T FORGET TO WISH HER A VERY HAPPY 18TH!!! So this chapter is dedicated by the Erns to our very own Grandma. I should play a prank on you someday XD Ly bitch ♥♥♥