Girls Astray. [Complete]

Amy: The girl who doesn't see

The alarm is supposed to soothingly wake me. Like anything that claws you from the sweet soft embrace that is sleep could do that soothingly. It was one of Mum's thoughtful gifts from last summer. She loves giving thoughtful gifts, but you have to say: "Thanks that's so thoughtful of you Mum", with a big fake smile on your face, even if it's the least thoughtful gift in the world. Otherwise, suffer the passive aggressive wrath that is my mother!

"I know how you hate waking up", she told me, smiling knowingly, "but this alarm is all the rage. On This Morning, Phillip said, you know how I love Philip, that's even good for those insoMANIAS."

"Insomnia Mum," I chuckled, "thanks though that's so thoughtful of you." The smile was glued to my lips as I stared at the ugly blue box.

It's light blue, like a summer's day according to the back of the box, the box also says it will slowly fill the room with natural daylight and play a cacophony of birdsong into the room, so you awake in a peaceful dreamlike state. I kid you not, it actually says dreamlike state.

Like every other morning I am abruptly awoken by jarring bright white light. The birds' morning song sounds more like mechanical dying cockerels or tortured seagulls crying for their dear life. Instinctively I shut the alarm off; I need to get rid of that thing.

Blurry eyed I make my way to the bathroom. My glowing white moon head greets me in the mirror; all puffy eyes and brown hair sticking out in every direction. What does Tom see in me? A warmth suddenly fills me up, slowly rising from my toes up through my stomach and all the way to the crown of my head, it feels like sinking into a hot bath for the first time. Melting, I smile at nothing-

"Amy!"

Right on time, Mum yells up the stairs, breaking my dream.

"Are you awake?"

"Yes Mum!" I call back through my grouchy hoarse morning throat.

"You're running late! Get moving or I won't be able to drive you!"

Another empty threat, I can't help but roll my eyes. She says the same thing every morning and has she ever refused a lift? You've guessed it, never.

My reflection smiles back at me- a toothy, white smile this time. All teeth and no lips. Today's going to be a good day, I can tell.

***

The Audi hums as we whizz past rows and rows of big suburban houses, the types with drives, fences and rose bushes.

Ed Sheeran plays as I bob my head to the beat, the morning sun shining through the glass, as I listen to the lyrics. Really listen. My mind starts to wander to a wedding- twirling in a white lacy dress to this song, the bride turns and oh it's me- the groom-

The breaks screech as we turn into Lolita's road and forces my body to lurch forward as the car comes to a grinding halt.

"Jesus Mum! Could you be a bit careful?"

I rub the back of my head where it whacked against the headboard.

She just rolls her eyes, jiggling her leg impatiently, whilst honking the horn.

My eyes dart to Lolita's apartment block, taking in all twelve stories of grey stone. Every blind or net curtain is closed, some windows are even blacked out with cardboard. The gargantuan building casts a thick shadow on the car park, everything is shielded in a veil of grey. A loan coke can tumbles across the grey floor, twisting and scraping against the ground.

"Can you call her Aimes? We need to go."

Mum's eye look shiftily around the building, darting from the tower block to the abandoned bin area, her hand trembling over the handbrake.