Girls Astray. [Complete]

Zoe: The girl who watched

"OK," she takes a sharp in breath and opens her eyes, "it happened last summer."

She looks up and waits for me to respond, to interrupt, but I stay silent. One thing I've learnt is that I need to listen.

"It was Tom's party, you know Tom, he likes a good party," she pauses and looks up to smirk at me, reminding me of today's earlier events. How can she be smiling at a time like this? The aversion I feel for Alex is spreading and growing like a weed slowly suffocating a tree and wrapping its way around the roots. Deeply embedded. Insidious.

"Anyway, Lolita was crazy. Like crazy crazy not just drunk. Her and Alex were all over each other, all night, in front of everyone. Like gross stuff, keep something private, right?"

Eyeballing me, she checks for my reaction, but my face doesn't move a muscle.

Gulping loudly, she catches my eye, she looks tired under the layers of thick orange makeup- her eyes circled in a purple glare, like something's been keeping her awake at night.

"Anyway, we were all drinking and things got a bit out of hand- nothing too bad, but we decided to play spin the bottle. Old school I know, but Alex was so keen and I mean it's Alex Coleman- the chance doesn't come up a lot." She pauses and titles then. My hand curls into a fist and I dig my nails into my palm. Stay calm- I think to myself- stay calm for Lolita.

"So the girl spins it, in case you didn't know, and the bottle seemed to keep landing on Alex. So, I get it, Lo would have felt a bit crap, these girls all kissing Alex. But he was so into it, that's the thing. He didn't try to stop it Amy, he wanted it. Lolita had to pull him off me."

She was smiling again. Full on, teeth on show, in my face, smiling, like this is a story to be proud about.

"Oh," I manage to respond whist trying to keep my voice even. I dug my nails in further.

"So it gets to Lo's turn and she spins the bottle, she didn't take her eyes of Alex, like it was creepy almost how much she was glaring at him- almost possessed like. But the bottle landed on-" she reaches forward and squeezes my hand, her voice lowering a little, "now, don't get upset honey, but it landed on Tom. Tom Price."

Pausing. She leans back assessing me; her pink tongue pokes out and licks her painted red lips.

"You ok?" She asks, nodding dramatically at me.

"Yes," I grimace.

"Well, you wouldn't believe it. They don't just kiss, well I mean they do, but she full on straddled him and then he put his hand..." she stops mid sentence and gestures to her breasts, "you can imagine what happened!"

I blink rapidly at her, trying to stay as still as possible.

"But that's not the worst part," her voice is getting quicker and higher now, like she's relishing in the moment, "they disappeared."

"Sorry? What do you mean- disappeared?"

I know what she means. I know instinctively, and suddenly a memory comes flooding back: Lolita's warning about Tom. My heart sinks.

"That's not even the worst part Amy, when they found them, well me and Alex found them, she was off her face, out of it. I thought there'd be a fight- a huge one. You know Alex is so territorial. But-"

Biting her lip she stops, her eyes glazing over as if she's finding the words to say.

"Just say it," I spit.

"Well, they did it."

"Who?"

"Alex and her."

"Straight after?"

"Straight after," her eyes soften for a moment, "she was messed up Amy. When we found her they were- you know- and she was crying and..."

Her face drops to the floor and I'm reminded of Alex all of a sudden, shrouded in his guilt.

"I could have- I wish I..." Her eyes suddenly well up with tears and her chin trembles; is this for real or just for show? A moment ago she was practically beaming at the memory.

She pushes her phone forward and places it onto my lap.

"Don't judge me," she manages to stutter before turning away.

'Did you enjoy watching my misery? Watching my attack? My abuse? Did it make you feel better about yourself. I know what you and Alex did. You wanted me distracted. You could have helped Zoe. L X'

I try to meet her gaze, but she won't look at me, her face is covered in a thin veil of sweat and her breath gets shallower and shallower.

"Zoe, do you know where she's gone?"

She looks up then, hastily, quickly, like a dog that heard the sound of it's food bowl rattle.

"She's gone?"

She breaks then, a heap on the grassy floor, her shoulders hunched over like fisherman's hook and I smirk then, smirk at the pathetic heap on the floor, then walk away.

Dialling Lolita's number I can't help but anticipate an answer, if she text Zoe surely she'll speak to me.

'Hi, this is Lolita. Do the thing after the beep.'