Here to Stay || Ashton Irwin (completed)

Chapter 3

My dream consisted of reliving the car crash over and over from different perspectives, but each time it got worse and worse. I saw it from my mother's perspective, from the passengers seat. Her heart speeding up as the headlights approached us. I felt her body move without me making it, her arm stretching across the car to push me back against the seat. I watched myself as she had, a jagged piece of metal piercing my lower stomach from the left. The nightmare fast forwarded. I opened my mothers eyes and found myself staring at the night sky, snow falling lightly onto my-well her face. My head turned to the side, seeing my father lying on the road as well. He was already staring back at me. My mother pushed off from the ground and walked towards another body, what I already knew was mine, a dark pool of blood already surrounding it. I felt her heart stop, I felt her emotions fill my head, I felt myself begin to join her in her cries. The scene fast forwarded again, but this time, it never stopped. I raced through the past couple of days as though watching a movie, but instead I also experienced every bit of emotion she had. It hurt, it hurt a lot, and when I woke up screaming and thrashing, nearly falling out of bed it almost didn't stop. 

"Emma?" Ashton asked, suddenly sitting next to me, "It's okay, it's okay, it was only a dream." 

My breathing was uneven and my hands clutched at my clothes. I was soaked from head to toe in cold sweat and my body was shaking uncontrollably. My mouth opened but I couldn't form words, my jaw just kept moving as if I were talking. 

"Emma, it's okay," he said scooting closer, crossing his legs on the blue comforter, "Do you want to talk about it?"

I gulped and tried to compose myself. Images of my sleep flashed at the back of my mind, pushing their way up as I fought to keep them surpressed. I shook my head just wanting to go back to sleep. 

"Are you sure? It may be easier to sleep," he added.

I tried to nod, but I just broke into tears. 

"I didn't mean to make you cry," he mumbled, worry tinted in his voice.

"I-I know," I stuttered, "I j-j-just, I saw my mom, and I saw the accident," I coughed and cleared my throat, "From-m her perspective and I... I saw myself die and it felt so real."

"I wish I could help you somehow," Ashton whispered after a period of silence, "I wish there was something I could do, I hate to see you like this."

"This is the only way you know me," I returned, much sharper than I imagined.

"I know," he frowned, "And I'm sorry."

I didn't reply. We just sorta sat there on the bed as my crying ceased. I laid back down and sunggled into the covers. I felt weight leave the mattress and listened as Ashton crawled into his bed. 

"Emma?"

"Yeah Ash?" I called back.

"Good night again."

"Good night again, Ashton."

- - - - - - -

I woke up in the morning to a knock at the door, no let me rephrase that, this was full out pounding on the door. 

"Ashton Fletcher Irwin you wake up this instant and let me in! You overslept by two fucking hours and if you think I'm going to pay for an education you don't take seriously you must be insane."

Ashton groaned and pushed himself off the ground. He staggered over to the door, his sweatpants riding extremely low on his hips, so low I had to force myself to avert my eyes. His hand ran through his messy hair and finally reached for the door. Ashton's father stood in the doorway practically red in the face, complementing the tie around his neck quite nicely.