the blue journal

three ♖

chapter three | min yoongi

05/24/17

hey, it's y/n again.

i never ended up writing down what happened between me and yoongi, to make him hate my guts. so, yesterday, i asked him to come with me to the janitor's closet so i could tell him something, and obviously, he agreed to.

also, i didn't mention me and yoongi have been dating, for a few weeks, so i knew just what to do.

when we arrived at the janitor's closet, i said the most hurtful things i could think of, but he didn't know that this was hurting me more than it was hurting him, because i had to pretend i don't love him.

"i'm breaking up with you," that was what i said, and he laughed at first, but then he grew more serious as he noticed i had a straight face.

"are you serious?"

"yes yoongi. don't you see? it was all a bet, i don't love you. do you really think we could be together? the good girl and the bad boy? man, you really are dumb."

and i left him after that, for the rest of the day, he tried to talk to me, but i ignored him. he texted me during class, threw paper at the back of my head, he tried his best to get my attention, and i could barely hold in my tears.

finally, he stopped, and i used that time to go the bathroom and cry. no one followed me, not even yoongi, so i just sat there, sobbing my heart out, and then i returned to class as if nothing happened, and yoongi didn't even spare me a glance.

today, i didn't end up doing anything worthy enough to write in this book. i just needed time to get over how i lost two amazing people, so i'm just going to chill for today, but tomorrow, i already know who i'm choosing.

park jimin, my ex boyfriend. he loves me, a lot. he's also one of my great friends, and i would be lying if i said i didn't miss him. sure, i was dating yoongi, but i love them both for different reasons. i love yoongi because he's mysterious, he always kept me waiting which made me crave for him more.

i love jimin because he's always there for me, he's the super sweet and caring guy, he always makes sure i'm okay and it melts my heart. i broke up with him because he was born into a rich family, and you know what that means. most of the time, it means you'll get married off to someone you barely know, so we decided to end it before it got too serious.

but i love them both, and i love them both equally, it would tear me apart if i had to choose between the two of them.

-

june 1st, 2017.

jimin sat at his desk, sighing as he placed his head onto the cold wood. homework papers from his english class were sprawled out everywhere, he was too caught up in his own thoughts to answer any of the questions that were written down.

he was confused about your death, for the most part. you never showed any signs of depression, suicide, or anything, you just acted like a bitch, one of those 'mean girls', i guess.

he looked at his wall of photos, and he realised he hadn't taken down your picture of when you two were dating yet, he had forgotten to. he always wanted to, but now, he no longer had the urge to.

sure, you hurt him, you made him feel like a piece of shit, which caused him to hate you (like you planned), but to him, life was a blessing, and you lost it because of reasons he didn't even know of, so he felt bad. he stared at your picture for the rest of the night, before crawling into bed, and falling asleep.

a/n

shorter chapter, anyways, people are asking me "is y/n gonna come back to life????" no, she is not a magical fairy, life is life. this is the big fat truth, yo. you need to accept it. next chapter is gna be about why jimin hates y/n, and an introduction for the next member. can y'all guess who it is? *cough* maknae line *cough* gucci *cough.