Cherish || grayson dolan

fourty seven

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Emercyn asks me as I zip the last bit of my stuff. I nod my head standing up and shrugging.

"I think we just need some time apart. I love Grayson and you and practically the whole world knows that. Right now, I just need to get back to New Jersey, do some school, and just be clear of him to think. He needs it as well and obviously this all has put a damper into his mood and the fans have pointed it out in the videos. I can't be the reason why he isn't putting his whole self out there." I explain to her, putting on my black converse that I haven't worn in what feels like forever.

"I think you leaving is going to take even a bigger tole on him. It's been a week H, are you still upset?" She asks. I give her a look as if we hadn't gone over this last night.

"Yes. We aren't broken up, I just can't deal
with any of this. Julia is still in LA and I can't do this again right now." I repeat myself from what I had told her last night. She nods her head and opens her arms out wide for me.

"I just don't want you to leave." She pouts as I hug her. I nod my head and sigh as we squeeze each other.

"You guys will be back in New Jersey in a week. You'll both live." I joke as we walk towards the bedroom door. She rolls her eyes and playfully shoves me and I practically fall into Grayson.

I apologize awkwardly and stand up, shooting her a look. She shrugs and walks over to Ethan. I look up at Grayson who was already looking at me and he gives me the smallest and weakest smile I have ever seen on him.

"Can we talk in my room real quick?" He asks. I nod my head and follow him into his room. He shuts the door behind me and I turn to look at him.

He looks at me for a second and neither of us say a word. It was silent and you would think it would feel awkward, but it felt right. Grayson's bags under his eyes were identical to mine. I know neither of us have gotten sleep the past week and thats why this is bad for us.

"Please don't go." He whispers, looking down at his feet. "I'm so sorry for lying to you and going behind your back. You're right, it was wrong and terrible. I let her control me again and I can't let her think that was okay. She- she's a terrible person and I shouldn't have let her have that much control over me when she is nothing to me. I just couldn't put everyones privacy at risk. I need you Hayden. You make me a better me and I need to be able to hold you, kiss you, and love you. Please baby, don't go." He frowns as he walks closer to me, cupping my face between his hands. He forces me to look at him and that's when I notice he is hurting.

We both are and all this happened because of Julia. It's crazy how someone can walk into your life and have complete control over you and not because they have a meaning in life,
but because they are horribly evil.

I grab his wrists and slowly take his hands away from my face. He looked taken back and upset at this action. When his arms are back at his side, I wipe his tears away from his face as I feel my begin to fall.

"I think a week away from each other will be good for us. Give us some time to think with out knowing the other is a room away. This is hurting us, we need some time away." I explain to him. He licks his lips and shakes his head at
me.

"You leaving is obviously hurting the both of us too. Here we are, both in tears because we can't bare to be away from each other. Admit it, Hayden. You know it's true so why leave? Let me love you and prove to you it was all a mistake. Let me prove to you she means nothing and that you are my everything. I haven't slept in a week, I'm drained." He sits on his bed and lets out a sigh. I could tell he was getting frustrated over the situation.

He was right, I can't bare to be away from him. But I've done a little bit of thinking and I think I need some me time for a little. I can't properly think about the situation knowing he is less than ten feet away at times.