Ginny Carney has been running since she was 17; running from the small town that stifled her, from her 'wild child' reputation, and from the boy she left behind. Now 25 Ginny finds herself a college dropout with no job, no boyfriend and forced to m...
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Ginny's POV
Beth came to get me from the cottage the next morning. I went home, I had no choice, June was expecting me at work Monday morning. I'm sure my parents could tell that there was something wrong but they didn't ask; that's what had allowed me to get into so much trouble when I was a teenager, my parent's willingness to completely ignore what was going on with me. Miles didn't try to come over on Sunday and I didn't go outside or near any windows so he wouldn't be able to tell if I was home. It was hard to believe that even yesterday we had been together, had been happy.
Monday morning I went to work and thankfully June treated me like everything was normal and I was grateful to her for that. My phone had died on Sunday and I hadn't bothered charging it because I didn't want Miles to be able to reach me; as angry as I was I knew I couldn't trust myself not to answer if he called and if he didn't call that would only hurt even worse. I half expected him to show up at the bakery when I was working but he didn't. I started going to the bar after work and staying late until I could be sure that Miles would be asleep and then I would get up and go to work extra early, let myself in and sit in the back until June showed up always pretending like I had just arrived when I heard her open the door. I stopped sleeping. I could feel that I was stuck in a downward spiral but I couldn't stop it; a part of me thought that I was getting everything I deserved.
For four days I went on like that. I would get up before the sun and drag myself to work where I would work on autopilot barely talking or interacting with anyone and then I would walk down the street to the bar where I would sit at the end where the overhead light was burnt out so I could almost go unnoticed by the other customers and Kenny would serve me vodka sodas until I almost forgot about Miles completely.
By Friday I didn't even feel human anymore. I just didn't want it to hurt anymore. I didn't want to feel anything. I was sitting in the bar after work and I just wanted everything to stop. I ordered too many drinks but I knew Kenny wouldn't cut me off, he had let Miles get completely plastered night after night after all; he hadn't started cutting Miles off until I had asked him to watch out for him but no one cared to watch out for me.
I drank until my vision went blurry then I drank one more. I knew I had gone too far but since I still wasn't feeling anything I couldn't make myself care. I don't know when or why I decided to leave but suddenly I found myself stumbling through town. I thought I was heading home but I couldn't make my eyes focus on any street signs or landmarks to figure out where I was. I was blacking in and out, I couldn't remember where I'd been. I must have stumbled and fallen because I came to lying on the sidewalk. The concrete was cold, I could feel it through my shirt. Where was my coat? I couldn't make myself get up, everything was spinning. I closed my eyes and when I opened them again someone was walking towards me. They were tall, big, male probably. I was filled with panic. I needed to get up, I needed to get home. I struggled to stand and tripped and fell again as the big figure came towards me even faster. I cried out as the man closed in on me.
"Shh, shh Gin it's ok. It's me." I collapsed into sobs upon hearing his voice again and then he was lifting me up and passed out again as he carried me down the street.
"Oh baby, what have you done?" He said sadly under his breath, he didn't expect an answer, probably didn't expect me to hear him.
He had to put me down to unlock his front door and I leaned against him with my eyes closed tight since the world was still spinning.
"Do you want me to take you home?" He asked quietly but I shook my head I didn't want anyone else, especially my parents, to see me like this.
"This is your fault" I slurred as he helped me into the house me stumbling against him.
"I know" he said quietly. I was expecting him to fight back, was even looking for a fight but he didn't bite.
"I was doing ... doing just fine without you" I tried to push away from him but I stumbled and sat down.
"I'm sure you were" He said and hooked his arms under mine and helped me up. The whole room spun again as I stood up.
"I'm gonna..." I choked out before clapping a hand to my mouth.
"Ok" He said and scooped me up and rushed me to the bathroom.
He held my hair back and rubbed my back as I was sick. When there was nothing left I slumped back against him. I felt him hesitate but then he wrapped his arms around me. I knew I was supposed to be mad at him, that he'd broken my heart more times than I could count, and that I wasn't supposed to be talking to him but I didn't have the energy to keep up the fight.
"It wasn't supposed to be like this" I said and then I was crying again. I was crying for Katie and for Miles and for all the things I had wanted but had never accomplished. I don't know how long we sat there with me crying and Miles trying to comfort me, I cried until I was so exhausted that I was falling asleep again. I came to with Miles carrying me again and somehow he managed to carry me upstairs where he laid me down in his childhood bedroom.
Miles rummaged around in some of the dresser drawers then handed me some pyjama pants and an old t-shirt and then left the room while I changed. I lay down on his twin bed and looked around the room that hadn't changed since high school; there were still pictures of the two of us taped to the wall beside his movie posters. We looked so happy in all of them. The one that I caught myself staring at the most was the one right beside the head of the bed. We were probably about 16 in the picture, it was from some party since we were both holding plastic cups. I was laughing at something and looking at the camera but Miles was facing me with his forehead resting against my temple his eyes closed but a huge grin on his face. I missed the two teenagers in that photo, I think that I missed her the most.
"Are you decent?" came a voice from the hallway and I managed a quiet yes.
Miles was carrying two glasses of water, "Drink this" He said handing me the first glass and he placed the second one on the bedside table. Miles took the empty glass from me and turned to leave.
"Cliff?" I whispered and he turned to face me, "Stay."
He sighed, "You're drunk" he said.
"I can't be alone" I pleaded and I honestly meant it, I couldn't bear to be by myself.
"Will you be mad at me in the morning if I do?"
"I do not speak for sober Ginny" I slurred. He sighed again but turned off the light and climbed into the small bed beside me. He wrapped his arms around me and we were both facing the picture on the wall.
"What happened to those kids?" I asked
"I don't know" he whispered,
"I'd like to find them again" I said and I wasn't sure I was making any sense but Cliff must have understood because all he said was
"Me too."
Author's note:
Hey everyone! Sorry it's been so long I've been travelling and then I forgot my notebook at home but this chapter is a tiny but longer so I hope that makes up for it? I'm excited to see what you think about this one, I really liked writing it. Let me know what you think! Talk to you soon 😊❤️
(also really sorry if there lots of errors I haven't had time to edit yet and I need to go to sleep but I really wanted to get this up tonight)
