Resolution

Twenty Three : Saffron

Twenty Three : Saffron

Really fucking fucked off because I deleted the original chapter of this and can't remember what I actually wrote so this chapter is shitty and written quickly and unedited and I neeD TO SLEEP OMG

When the world takes one person away from you, you learn to get over it, convincing yourself nature is balancing itself out, perfecting the circle of life. 

But when they take another away from you, especially at a young age, it's hard to understand and it's easy to be angry.

On the Friday night, a few hours before Darci was set to leave, I was trying very hard not to scream out in frustration. I was angry and I was hurt.

The drive to the airport was silent. After Darci checked in, we sat around and idly chatted amongst ourselves. It was just the two of us, no dad, no Coral and no Harry. But deep down, I wanted—no needed— Harry next to me because I wasn't sure how I was going to cope when Darci left. But alas, we couldn't be seen together in such a public place so he had to stay behind. It added fuel to the negative emotions swirling inside of me.

An hour passed of Darci and I chatting about everything and nothing until her flight number was called overhead. I sucked in a sharp breath. This was really happening.

Wordlessly, the both of us walked to the departure gates. Coming to a standstill, Darci faced me. She had tears in her eyes. I wanted so much to have tears in my eyes too, to express the pain I was feeling but no matter how hard I tried, my body wasn't willing to share that weakness to anyone.

"So this is it," she said quietly.

"I guess so." My tone matched hers. "Have you got everything?"

"I think so.”

I pulled my bottom lip between my teeth, unsure of what to do. We stared at each other, a long bout of silence stretching wide.

Before either of us could utter calm words of condolence, Darci pulled me into a hug, wrapping her arms tightly around me. I didn't hesitate to hug her back. The pain in my body flared when I felt her shoulders shake from crying.

I squeezed my eyes shut. "Don't be a stranger," I said lowly. "Call me as soon as you land.”

"Of course," she hiccupped.

I pulled back and held her at arm's length. She took a shuddering breath. "Everything's going to be okay."

"How can you say that—“

She cut me off with, "It is, Saffron. Everything always turns out okay. You have Harry and Coral and your parents and all the new friends you've made. You have to remember: you are not alone."

I squeezed my eyes shut again. "I don't know what I'm going to do without you."

"You'll figure it out," she stated. "You always do. You've always been the smart one of the two of us."

I laughed lightly. "I love you, you know that, right?"

"And I love you too." She wrapped me in another tear-filled hug. "I'll love you forever, even after I'm gone."

I took a deep breath and she stepped back. "Who am I supposed to go to when I need to bitch about the little things?"

She rolled her eyes. "I'm not dead yet, I'll still be around to call and Skype." She gave me a pointed look. "But Harry will always be around, Saff, don't forget that. Don't hide from him. Don't push him away. Don't hate him. You need him, alright? Let him be there for you. Let him be your anchor."