Mama

Chapter Thirteen

August 2001:

Next week is Aaliyah's funeral, and her family requested that Elgin and I both sing a song together; a hymnal to be exact.

I've been feeling a little better, day by day, and so I'm spending time talking to Denim. Four months from now, I'll be someone's mama, and my priorities with change.

My sister-in-law, Karen stopped by yesterday, to buy me some of my cravings; jolly ranchers, tacos, and chicken wings. As of now, Denim is five pounds, and his heartbeat is great.

My mother comes over to spend time with me, meanwhile the girls, are singing background vocals for Tamar, now that she's on tour.

Kidada asked me if I would consider, remarrying someone. Keri was the man for me, but I also would like another child by the time, Denim turns a year old. There's nobody out there for me. I'm just a widow, who's thirty four, and having a child.

I was in bed, watching MTV, and all week long, they've been playing music videos by Aaliyah. I changed the channel, to watch reruns of Moesha. One of my favorite artists is Brandy; one, she's a contralto, and two, she understands the struggles of being perfect, in the limelight.
•••
"I love you." Keri said, kissing my cheek. I wrapped my arms around his neck, and looked into his eyes.

"I love you, too." I said, into his neck. My eyes opened, and looked next to me, with nobody there. I wanted to cry, but at this point, I'm tiring of shedding these tears.

I'm waiting for Denim to come, so I won't be alone in this house, everyday. When I hit eight months, Mommy is going to live with me for a year, so she can help me with the baby.

The doctor says that I just need to stop stressing, and be happy. My emotions take over, and I can't control them.

Karen is coming by now, along with a special surprise. I'm so glad that people still come and visit me. The doorbell rang, and I opened the front door, to see Karen, and the woman who hates me; my mother in-law, Mrs. Lewis.