Her New Mommy

This is it

When I woke up that morning I momentarily forgot what was going to happen tonight and my eyes welled up with unshed tears at the realization of what I was going to leave behind. I shook off that feeling real quick because I chose this, I wanted to end this and I sure as hell will. I was so lost in thought that I didn't even notice that Cole wasn't next to me and at that moment I heard a commotion downstairs. I quickly got out of bed and went into the bathroom to pee and brush my teeth. Once I was done I went downstairs and saw Cole and Jasmine in the kitchen cooking. 

"Well isn't this something?" I said while leaning on the door frame. 

"Mommy!" Jas squealed and jumped into my arms. 

"Hey baby girl, I missed you," I told her as I showered her with kisses. 

"Hey babe," said Cole and pecked me on the lips. "I'm making eggs and bacon, is there anything else you want with it?"

I put down Jas and went to the cabinet, pulled out a can and turned to the two with a giant smile on my face and said, "beans." 

Once Cole and I had finished everything the three of us sat down at the table and ate our breakfast together, and I loved it.

"Shouldn't you be at work? Shouldn't Jas be at school?" I asked with my face stuffed with bacon. 

"We're going in a little late today. What about you? You haven't been to work in a couple days, everything okay?" he asked looking at me with concern. 

"Oh yeah I'm just a little under the weather is all, I should be fine by tomorrow or so," I said lying smoothly. 

"Want me to stay home with you today and watch after you?"

"Thanks love, that's really sweet but I think I should be okay."

Too soon we had finished breakfast and washed the dishes, I wish we could've had a little more time. I walked them to the door and gave Jas a giant hug and kiss. I turned toward Cole and looked him in the eyes and kissed him passionately. 

"I love you," I told him. 

"I love you too, I'll see you soon babe," he said kissing me one last time and heading to his car. 

Once they were out of eyesight I ran up the stairs to get my wallet. I got in my car and drove to the nearest hunting shop.

"Hello, I need ammo for a 9mm pistol and I'm going to need an Elk Ridge Ultimate Fix Blade, please," I said to the worker. He didn't ask any questions and instead just rung me up.

"That'll be 60.89. Is that all you need?" 

"Yeah that should be it," I said handing over my debit card. He places my items in a bag and I was gone as fast as I came. 

When I got home I went into my room and took out my gun. I reloaded the clip and put the safety on before placing it next to my knife. I decided that if this was going to be my last day then I shouldn't leave without explaining myself, I grabbed some paper and a pen and sat down on my desk. I started with Andrea and made sure to tell her just how much I loved her and that I want her to take a chance with Will. I then started writing one for Jeff and then one for Linda. I wrote one for Jasmine and last but not least, I wrote one for Cole. I told him that I didn't want him to think that this was his fault and I didn't want him to play the blame game and to not think about the 'what ifs.' I made sure to tell him how much I loved him and to take care of our daughter and love her for me. By the time I was done with all the letters I was shocked to see that it was already after 5. I let out a shaky breath as the time grew nearer. Andrea had told me that she was going to Will's after work and Cole was working until 7 so I knew that I would be alone and there wouldn't be anyone to stop me. I go to my closet and pull out a pair of black jeans, a white tank top, my black leather jacket, and my black combat boots. I put my gun in the waistband of my jeans and I placed my knife inside my combat boot.  As the time grew nearer I wasn't scared, I was determined. This man took too much away from me and I'll be damned if he took away anything else.