beyond the monotonous city

fourty seven

Lauren woke up and felt like she was a different person.

Maybe that was the feeling of starting anew. She came downstairs to her mom, who was on the phone talking in hushed tones. She waited until her mom was done.

"What was that?" Lauren asked.

Her mom approached her, excitedly. "Lauren, you'll never believe it. The universities, they all reached out to you. Scholarships, acceptance letters."

Lauren felt her jaw drop before her mom pulled her to the kitchen table. There lay all the letters in their respective envelopes. Lauren opened them one by one and felt her tears fall. Her hard work. It all paid off. The last envelope she opened was from Harvard and she felt her heartbeat slow down.

Her mom gripped at her shoulders, just as nervous.

No words explain how she felt the moment she read 'Congratulations'. She was sobbing, not being able to finish reading the letter, as her mom sobbed alongside her as she hugged her.

She got scholarship offers into schools she didn't apply for and got some for the schools she did want like Yale, and Harvard. It felt like a dream come true.

She spent the whole morning, just rereading the letters she got. She felt entranced as if she was watching her life play out for her.

The first person she called on instinct was Keana. "Ke, something happened." She said, in suspense.

The other voice on the line, stopped. "Laur, is everything okay? What happened?" panic could be heard from her voice.

"Ke, I did it! I got into Harvard! On scholarship!" Lauren relayed.

She heard a high-pitched scream come from the other line. It took a minute before Keana spoke again. "I'm sorry, I'm a bit hungover from last night but damn Laur! I'm so proud of you, I always knew you could do it! What did you get into?"

"Women Gender and Sexuality."

"Wow that's the most Lauren course I could ever hear. You'll do well Lauren! I know you will!" Keana assured her. "Well your mom must be really proud it's a scholarship, Laur. That's something else. Only you!"

"I feel like I'm finally giving back after all the nights she's helped me." Lauren said, the feeling finally settling and sinking in.

"You do that. Can't wait to see you then! I'll visit you when I can!" Keana promised.

Lauren hung up and felt in higher spirits than she ever felt. She realized the first person she wanted to tell the good news too was Camila but somehow it was as if her head knew she wasn't there anymore, eliminating her from the options. That made her sad.

Clara started cooking for lunch and saw Lauren's sudden change in demeanor. "What's the matter, honey?"

"It's just I think I think about her less and less each and every day. I still miss her but I'm scared I'll one day stop." Lauren admitted, feeling like a terrible friend.

"That's really the way it is. She can't keep occupying the same amount of space in your mind the whole time. You have to move on eventually." Clara reasoned. Her mom was right, as that was why she was letting go. But it scared her how she started to fade from her memory already.

She nodded, remembering the reason why she visited the nightclub the night before and let all her worries, troubles and fears go. It had to happen so she could grow and move onto the next chapter of her life.

"You won't be leaving her memory in vain. You're bringing with you experiences, the ones you had with her, with you all your life. Now isn't that comforting? The memories that shaped you stay with you forever." Clara said, calmly.