My Love (z.m)

Edges

*This is a really short chapter, but that's cause I'm going to post a poem today, so check that out too!
Deepika:
As me and Zayn drove in silence I couldn't take this.

I learned that love always hurt me.

I can't say I love Zayn, because I've only known him for a rough month or so.

Yet I admit, I do have something with him.

Maybe if I just forget about him, then it won't hurt.

Maybe if I listen to my mother, life wouldn't hurt as much.

It's a silly thought.

To some people.

For me it was logically explainable, No Love Equals No Emotion.

Harsh words but it's the truth.

Maybe if I try to switch my dorm I can get away.

But Zayn would literally go to every dorm and check if I'm there.

I will have to move out until my mother calls me to come back home.

I don't want me and Zayn to get any closer, cause I don't want to hurt him or myself.

I technically have given up, but I had my opportunity.

The fact that I care about Zayn, it hurts.

I wouldn't be able to bare anything stronger.

Maybe I was scared of love or opportunities.

I just need to get away, from something I don't even know, I'm honestly not sure what I'm going to do or what I'm thinking at the moment.

"Deepika, are you okay?" Zayn asked as he carefully looked at me.

"Yeah..I need to tell you something." I spoke.

Zayn looked puzzled but then said, "I'm listening."

"Well, if anything happens to me, I will need u to...forget me." I uttered, as the anxiety surrounded me I turned my head to the window.

I couldn't see his reaction.

"Deepika, relax nothing is gonna happen to you." He said as he smiled at me.

"No Zayn, you aren't understanding." I proclaimed.

"I don't get what I'm missing." He said in perplex.

"I meant, if I, Deepika do something, something that would affect your emotions... then I need you to forget about me." I said as I made it clear of me.

"That's silly, why would you do anything that would affect us devastatingly." He said nervously laughing.

We then reached UCLA and Parker in front of our dorm building.

As we unbuckled our seats I looked at him and said,"Just think of me as Gigi..I need you to forget about me."

Zayn then froze and stared at me deep into my eyes.

"Deepika, it's too late, I can't just erase you out of my head, I can just forget about you, I cant just throw you away without fighting, I can't do any of that." He said as he closed his eyes.

I then held his hand.

"You have done it before."

"DEEPIKA STOP SAYING NONSENSE!" He frustratingly yelled.

"Nonsense. NONSENSE? Zayn I'M TRYING TO PROTECT YOUR FEELINGS FROM GETTING HURT AGAIN." I yelled as I quickly got out of the car.

I closed the door and ran to the front of the car, as I looked through the window I could see a worried look on his face.

He then slowly stepped out of his car.

As he looked at the black concrete he slowly lifted his head, examining my direction.

"I'm sorry." I spoke as my voice cracked.

He then closed his door.

"Deepika, imma say this one phrase."

"If you leave me in some kind of way, I will get hurt worse, I will loose hope of love. Not only that, but if you do something to yourself I'll kill myself, because I can't see myself getting closer to anyone else." He spoke as he started walking towards me.

I then stepped back as he walked forward.

"No Zayn, I don't even understand how our relationship grew, you hated me the first time we met and then THE SAME DAY you had changed. I don't know how you can do that. So answer me, what is the base of our relationship?" I spoke as that question was inside me ever since the first day I came to Los Angeles.

"Deepika, I had changed because I wanted to get to know you since you were gonna be my roommate 24/7. After a couple of hours I felt this weird but really dope aura with you, it was like a natural connection because it was like everything was trying its hardest just for us to have a normal conversation, even during the bus ride you had kind of changed me, you interested me, you attracted me, I don't know if you know this but you changed me for the better, you make me happy, from my whole time in LA I have only been the happiest when I was with you." He spoke as a smile grew on his face.

"Zayn, you made me the happiest my whole life too, but since we are so close I don't want anything to separate us and that's the problem, I just don't want either of us hurt since we have such a strong connection, I've never felt this strong of a connection with anyone except my dad. I'm scared of losing the same People. I'm not only scared, but I'm tired of it, that's why I'm saying if I do something that would change our lives I want you to accept the change." I said as I tried to explain my mind set the best I could.

"I lost Gigi, and let me tell you, I liked her a lot, she meant a lot to me, when I lost her I was devastated, but then I met you and you changed everything, you gave me this huge amount of hope that I'm addicted to."

"I'm addicted to you." He spoke as he sat on the front of his car.
End Of Chapter 21 - My Love - What Will Happen Next? - Find Out Until The Next Update.