milk stealer: give me some bread
the tree expert™: connor? connor murphy? but you're dead?
milk stealer: spoiler alert
goddess of jeans: i fucking told you connor from the moment you started dating that poor boy. you. are. not. allowed. to. get. him. high. with. you.
milk stealer: bread
the tree expert™: and Passover
jared says fuckyou: my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard and i say im a holy catholic straight man who likes women and they all leave disappointed because they couldn't get me or my mikeshake
mike stealer: mikeshake?
jared says fuckyou: you know, mike faist
milk stealer: what?
goddess of jeans: connor did you get him high too??
milk stealer: no i just reinvented them
jared says fuckyou: a mikeshake is when mike faist shakes his body
milk stealer: he's definitely high
feminist: 420 !1!!1!1!!!1!
goddess of jeans: what the fuck is alana high too? is everyone high? connor what did you dO?
jared says fuckyou: alana is not high Alana is just that friend that makes weed jokes all the time but when offered to smoke is utterly petrified
milk stealer: reinvention
goddess of jeans: more like intervention
jared says fuckyou: mikeshake
milk stealer: i am mike faist
everyone except jared because he's already too far beyond the fourth wall he's playing himself in the show (sorry will): who the fuck is mike faist
jared says fuckyou: a tony award nominee
goddess of jeans: who the fuck is tony
milk stealer: surprise zoe everyone but you is high
feminist: connor literally out of all of us you are the only one that's high
the tree expert™: yea
jared says fuckyou: yea
goddess of jeans: sean from chick fil a says fuck you
milk stealer: well fuck you too bitch
jared says fuckyou: MEME
feminist: how's fishtolyn, evan?
the tree expert™: amazing
milk stealer: we bought her a big fish bowl and a rainbow bridge she's our daughter now
jared says fuckyou: looks like evan and connor are skipping all the bases and going for a home run because they're already havin babies
goddess of jeans: do you know anything about baseball jared
michael park has added himself to the conversation
connors dad: oh shit
michael park has left the conversation
milk stealer: what the fuck?
larry murphy has added himself to the conversation
dad: SHAVING CREAM RUBBERBANDS MATTRESS REPEAT FUCK YOU CONNOR FOR CRUSHING MY CLICHE DREAMS OF BEING A BASEBALL DAD
larry murphy has well, like he just got up and threw his phone in a lake with the laptop from dear evan hansen 2 on ao3 (seriously go read it it's fucking hilarious)
milk stealer: did my dad just cuss me out?
goddess of jeans: what the fuck is wrong with our parents
feminist: but the burning question, how are people just adding themselves to the conversation?????????????
the tree expert™: weed
authors note:
im seeing DEH on July 18th, if you live in NYC or if you're going to see it either July 18th @ 7 or July 19th @ 2 hmu on @foundinghamilton also this story is just getting worse
