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ISABEL heaved a sigh. Inaamin niyang sa anim na taon na silang tatlo lang nina Luisa at Santiago ay miminsan ring pumasok sa isip niya ang tagpo kung saan kailangan niyang kausapin ang mga bata tungkol sa ama ng mga ito.
She imagined this scene unfolding a hundred times in her head but nothing prepared her for this moment.
Nakatayo silang dalawa ni Alexander sa harapan ni Luisa at Santiago na nakaupo pa rin sa couch. The twins were looking up at them with innocent eyes and Isabel felt like she was about to faint.
Or puke.
Or both.
Hindi pa siya nakaramdam ng ganitong klase ng kaba sa buong buhay niya. Alam niyang kapag nagkamali siya sa kahit na anong paraan ay hindi maganda ang epekto sa mga bata. She could literally break their young hearts if she failed.
And she definitely didn't want that.
Napasinghap siya nang maramdaman niya ang kamay ni Alexander sa likod niya. Naglakbay iyon patungo sakanyang balikat and he gently squeezed her shoulder as if telling her that she can do it. Aminin man niya o hindi, it helped a lot that she was not alone in this.
So much for not wanting him to touch her.
Tumikhim siya, both to clear her throat and to stop herself from thinking about Alexander's touch or anything about him for that matter. Kailangan niyang magconcentrate sa kailangan niyang sabihin sa dalawang bata.
Dahan-dahan siyang lumapit sa kambal at lumuhod siya sa harap ng mga ito. Hinawakan niya ang parehong kanang kamay ng mga ito and with one long intake of breath, she spoke.
"Luisa" she began, her voice almost a whisper. "Tiago... Nanay has something to tell you" dugtong pa niya and the twins looked at her expectantly.
It's now or never.
"You see. I want you to meet someone... Someone who's gonna be a part of your lives from now on for a long..." she paused. "Very long, long, long time."
Pakiramdam niya ay malalagutan siya ng hininga dahil sa bikig sakanyang lalamunan pero alam niyang kailangan niyang magpatuloy. Lumingon siya sa direksyon ni Alexander and he just stood there looking at her with... admiration?
"I-I want you to meet Alexander Sebastian" she choked the words out, still looking up at Alexander as she held the twins' hands tighter in hers.
As if taking those words as his cue, Alexander walked towards them and knelt beside her in front of the twins. Isabel would have thought that he was all cool about this if she didn't see the way his hands were shaking at his sides.
He's as nervous as she was and she took comfort in that thought.
Hindi niya alam kung gaano katagal sila sa ganoong pwesto, the kids sitting on the couch with two adults kneeling in front of them. Nakalimutan na rin yata niya ang kailangan niyang sabihin because the twins were looking at Alexander with interest.
"Are you our Tatay?"
Wala sa sariling namilog ang mga mata ni Isabel nang marinig niya ang mga salitang iyon mula sa bibig ni Luisa. Tama ba ang pagkakarinig niya?
Did Luisa just asked Alexander that question?
Sa dinami-dami ng pinakilala niyang mga lalaking kaibigan sa kambal, ni minsan ay walang tinanong ang isa man sa mga ito ng ganoong klase ng tanong. She didn't even know that the concept of having a father was not foreign to the kids.
Suddenly her mind was a blank.
Ano ang gagawin niya?
Kailangan bang siya ang sumagot ng tanong na iyon ni Luisa o hahayaan na lang niya na si Alexander ang magsalita dahil ito naman ang tinanong ng bata?
God! She sucked at confrontations.
In a panic, she swiveled her gaze to Alexander. Parang slow motion na ngumiti si Alexander kay Luisa and he nodded his head. With a loud squeal, mabilis pa sa alas kwatro na tumalon si Luisa mula sa pagkakaupo sa couch at dinamba ng yakap si Alexander.
Pakiramdam ni Isabel ay para siyang nanonood ng isang eksena sa pelikula nang mga oras na yun. Sinalubong ni Alexander ng mahigpit na yakap ang munting katawan ni Luisa. She then heard him chuckle as the little girl gave him a sweet kiss on the cheek.
Wala sa sariling nabaling ang tingin ni Isabel kay Tiago na nakaupo pa rin sa couch. He was looking at Luisa and Alexander but his face was expressionless. As if sensing his gaze, Luisa and Alexander looked at the fragile little boy on the couch.
Napansin ni Isabel na humigpit ang pagkakahawak ni Santiago sakanyang kamay and she felt like crying. Ito ang kauna-unahang pagkakataon na hindi niya alam kung ano ang nararamdaman ng panganay niya. She could not even open her mouth to say anything.
And it felt awful being helpless like that.
Pagkatapos ng mahabang sandali ng katahimikan ay dahan-dahang binitawan ni Alexander si Luisa at iginiya patungo kay Isabel, without breaking eye contact with his son. Hinalikan at niyakap ni Isabel si Luisa habang pinapanood niya ang mga kilos ng mag-ama.
What she saw next was not something she expected.
Alexander held out his hand, in a gesture of a handshake, between him and Santiago.
"My name is Alexander Sebastian" simula ni Alexander in his most confident tone as Santiago looked at his father's outstretched hand. "And you are...?" dugtong pa ni Alexander.
"M-my name is Santiago..." his little voice quivered as he held out his small hand and shook hands with Alexander. "A-are you... Are you really our Tatay?" pahabol na tanong nito habang kahawak-kamay pa rin si Alexander.
"Yes I am" sagot ni Alexander. "But only if you want me to."
The little boy seemed to consider the thought a little.
"Do you want me to be your Tatay, Santiago?"
Santiago slowly nodded his head.
"Can I hug you too?" mayamaya ay tanong ni Santiago kay Alexander.
Alexander opened his arms as an answer and Santiago slid from the couch and hugged his father for the first time. Luisa joined in the hug and Isabel saw just how happy she had made three people by just finally telling the truth.
Kitang-kita rin niya kung paanong naglandas ang luha mula sa mga mata ni Alexander habang yakap nito ang kambal. Hindi maipaliwanag ni Isabel ang nararamdaman niya nang mga oras na yun and so she did what she has never done in a long time.
She let her tears fall from her eyes.
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BINABASA MO ANG
Until You Love Me Again
RomanceWARNING: This story has mature content is not advisable for young readers. Read at your own risk! Since birth, they were best of friends. Ten years ago, she loved him secretly. Six years ago, they made love. Or so she thought. Six years ago, he brok...
