Integritale

Chapter 28.5 (Extra): Brother

Papyrus was walking back home from Waterfall. It had been a tiring day. His training with Undyne was becoming more and more intense as time passed. And he was glad about it. Because, one day, he would become the best Royal Guard the Underground would ever see!

He reached his house and unlocked the door. Walking in, he saw the same scene as the previous three weeks: Sans lying on the sofa, with the TV playing a program he was probably not watching. Papyrus sighed. How long would it take for Sans to recover?

''Hello, Sans! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, am home!'', he got tempted to shout, but didn't. He knew he would get no response to that. It had already been obvious that being his usual, pompous self wasn't helping much. He needed a new approach. Therefore, he had decided to be more silent. But even that didn't seem to be working.

''Sans needs more time'', he kept saying to himself, trying to diminish his worries. But, in reality, he always feared. Feared that Sans would never go back to his former, happy-go-lucky self. It was ironic. He would always scold his brother for not being serious enough, but now, the only thing he wanted was for the Sans he knew to recover.

He hanged his coat and sat besides him on the couch. Sans was awake, but seemed lost in his own world again.

-Hey there, Sans.

No response, as expected.

-What are you watching?

Again, no response. Papyrus felt the need to shake his brother, shout some logic into his head. But he had tried it before. He had even slapped him once and instantly regretted it. It wasn't working. Nothing was working so far.

Papyrus stared at the TV, not caring for the program playing. A few minutes passed, but it felt like an eternity. Sans hadn't moved a muscle. He couldn't bear seeing him defeated like that any longer. He sighed and stood up, heading for the kitchen.

That was when he felt something pulling him back. He turned around and saw Sans weakly holding onto his scarf, without looking at him.

-Stay...he mumbled in a sad voice.

Papyrus was surprised. Sans hadn't talked to him ever since he had cleaned his room, forcing him out. But now, hope had returned to him. Because, after so many endless days, there was finally a reaction, even the slightest one.

He sat back on the couch, looking at Sans. There had been a few times Papyrus believed that Sans was so lost in his thoughts he didn't even notice he was there. But it tuned out he knew. At least, he did this one time. And, most importantly, Sans wanted him there.

Another few silent minutes passed. Papyrus was unsure of what to do next. Should he talk to Sans? Or would that be too pushy, forcing them back to square one?

-I...really miss her, you know.

-I know...

Silence again. Papyrus was starting to feel uncomfortable. Maybe he needed to do something now that he had the chance. Or maybe if he did something, he'd lose that rare chance forever. After a lot of contemplation, he decided to risk it before it was too late.

-Do you wanna...talk about it?

-There's nothing to say. She's dead.

Sans was still looking at the void. His voice was distant, as if he was drifting into his own world again. Papyrus wondered whether that world was a happy one, full of Sans's good memories, or a dark one, filled with sadness and despair. Whatever it was, it wasn't real. He needed to pull his brother away from it.

-I understand how you feel, but-

-Have you ever been in love, Papyrus?

-No...

-Then you don't understand.

Papyrus looked down. Maybe he needed to back off, after all. But Sans was finally talking. No, he needed to pursue the opportunity he was given.

-I might not know a lot about falling in love... But I do love you.

Sans, for the first time, turned and looked at his brother.

-And I'm scared, Sans! It feels so excruciating to see you suffering in silence like that, day in and day out. And always being unable to do anything for you... It's as if he I'm trapped in the same day, trying to save you over and over, with no result! It's like...I'm losing you too, only more slowly...

Papyrus could barely hold his tears back. Sans was shocked. He realised he had put his brother through the same, terrifying experience that had almost driven him mad. He quickly sat up and hugged Papyrus.

-I'm sorry Paps...I had no idea...

Papyrus hugged Sans back.

-Just...open up a little, will you? I'm your brother... If you can't confide in me...then in who...?

Papyrus felt Sans holding him tighter.

-I can't...I can't live without her...!! It hurts, Paps...It hurts so much!!!

Sans had burst in tears. Papyrus just stayed silent, patting his back and feeling each and every sob. Finally, he was able to be there for Sans.

-Let it all out, brother... Let it all out...